GGG is DONE!

I finished the 1st movie, PAH! Now I just have to export it to QuickTime and drop it off tmw for Lopez :D I think the site will be ready to premiere next Monday or Tuesday?

Works been busy as usual. Last night the twins were so much fun. I brought them "Finding Nemo" bath tub toys, it was on sale and its a good reward for them and their patience. After all when your 3 years old, an hour seems like eternity!

Tmw night I head to PA for Baba's bday. I am hoping for lots of R&R. Clyde is also looking forward to going down. He and Baba get along famously. Also Clyde has been signing more now, yay! He used a sign the other night that I was surprised he knew. I cant remmy what it was but the fact is, he knows more than he lets on. I say unleash your inner ASL beast and lets get those hands flying! We havent figured out what to do for Valentines day, its kinda hard cuz its on a Wednesday and I work that day. Funny with my ex, I cant recall any valentines day that stood out as memorable. I am curious to see what Clyde plans for us? I am not interested in going out to eat, we do that normally and it wouldnt be very special. I want to do something unique and memorable.

MTA's lack of conern for Deaf-Blind riders

My DB friend sent me this email and I just had to post it. If you are sighted and hearing, you may take for granted how hard it is for the rest of us who may be deaf or Deaf-blind and using the MTA buses/trains.

I got home safe and sound but the trip from LI to the Bronx was miserable!
It took me home almost four hours unexpectedly.

Able-ride driver walked me to the right tracks in Hicksville train station
for Manhattan. I thanked him for help but then I barely missed trains and
waited for half an hour for another train to Penn Station.I asked the
conductor if I could take another train at Jamaica for Flushing and said "NO" I would have to change other trains at Woodside. I said "never mind" and decided
to stay that trains all the way to Penn Station.

I walked to the subway station and waited for #2 uptown express tracks. I
waited for 20 minutes and got puzzled what's wrong with #2 trains?? I asked
someone and said that I would have to go to local tracks due to repairs on
express tracks on weekends! I took #1 train for Times Square and took shuttle
trains from Times Square for Grand Central Terminal and took #6 trains for
Pelham Bay Park station so finally I was able to relax and read Sunday
newspapers all the way to last stop but I got puzzled that #6 trains stopped at
Parkchester Avenue for very long but then I saw one male (maybe homeless) sleeping on the seat and I checked the info on ceilings and said Parkchester Ave was the
last stop so I went over and pulled EMERGENCY alarm and blew my metal whistle
for attention. Workers came by there to get me out of trains. They told
me that no trains were running between Parkchester and Pelham Bay Park
station due to repairs on weekends. Workers walked me to catch shuttle bus from
Parkchester for Pelham Bay Park before it got dark. I got QBX1 bus from
Pelham Bay Park for Co-op City! It was miserable! I have seen some subway
trains on weekends very limited, some other trains were not up and running in
parts of The Bronx, and other trains on local tracks instead of express
because of repairs and detours. Yes I understand MTA but MTA should ALERT
everyone postings at stations AHEAD of time so that passengers can be well prepared
for subway routes and shuttle bus on weekends. How could deaf, and deaf-blind passengers be heard of their announcements from conductors for detours
and different routes or last stops like at Parkchester? Blind passengers
cannot see postings or bulletin board at stations (and platforms) so how could
blind passengers be seen?
I think it's so important for us to discuss this with MTA for proposals and
suggestions in the future for weekend services.I have seen postings at different subway stations in Brooklyn and Manhattan but not in the Bronx! BUMMER
Thank you for listening and sharing comments with me!
Good night from the Bronx,
XXXXX

Wow, that sucks royally that he had to go through all that trouble just to get home There's gotta be a better way for Deaf and Deaf-Blinds to recieve last minute information on the MTA services.

My GGG movie is almost done, just need 2 more sounds and its completed. Clyde helped me adjust the volume on it last night. I am anxious to get my website up and running by early next week.

Am on my way now to tutor the 3 year old twins :-D

D-PAN

Kinda looks like C-span but instead this is a website I found at Znuage blog for deafies and hoh folks to go and watch videos of people signing various songs so that we can follow the lyrics with the ASL and music. Looks interesting, and seems fairly new. Check out D-Pan

Have an hour to kill so I thought I would also post this information about Right Rides for women here in NYC (I would like them to provide a way to contact them via email or sms/txt msg) afterall its kinda hard for us deafies to call them for a ride. This is a free service for all women on Saturday nights from midnight to 3am.

For fun, check out FredFlare's stuff. Their stuff is reasonably priced.

Yay, work is almost done and Im outta here!

No it's not OVeR

Well some of you may be wondering what exactly am I refering to? All I will say is relationships take a lot of work and dedication. Clyde and I decided to do the work that is necessary to make our relationship stronger. *imitates Forrest Gump* That's all I have to say about that.

Friday nite, I visited went to Blondie's apt where Syzmanski was there and we all ate good Indian food. Clyde doesnt like Indian so the girls are always up for Indian food and man was it good, especially on a cold night like that one. I tried a new meal called dosa, its like a spongy flat bread wrap, excellent. Of course the chicken marsala rules with some nan bread, yum!

Saturday I met with my two students to do editing for their project. We were there for about 6 hours. They did a great job. I just have to add the subtitles which Clyde plans to help me with that tonight after work. Saturday night I was with Clyde having a "heart to heart" talk.

Yesterday was laundry day. King came by to show me her video project she's been editing. I helped her tighten some scenes and with any questions she had. I see a filmmaker in the works :D Then Clyde and Gabe came by and with my roommate, we ordered pizza and it was a lot of fun. I love having my apt be a place where people can come by and hang out. I think it comes from all those years living in the dorm at MSSD and my numerous apts in Maryland where people were always coming and going. Poor Szymanski, she is having a huge problem with ASSwipe! ASSwipe changed the locks on her and threatened to destroy her stuff. King, Szymanski, Clyde and I went and got the police to come with us to the apt. So Beth could get the last of her belongings but there was no answer. I have a pretty good suspicion that he was there but didn't answer the door. The police officer was more than aware of ASSwipes history. Basically this officer is just waiting for a reason to arrest ASSwipe, should we be so lucky!

Today I am at work, the GGG movie is all done except for one "ping" for the special effects and 1 melody for one scene and voila, its DONE! It feels good to be editing on a more regular basis.

I think its OVeR...

Bad manners on Wall St.

Lately people's bad manners have really been getting on my nerves. I can't stand rude or inconsiderate people. Like those who let the door slam right in your face. Or being plain old unfriendly and unkind. Yesterday Clyde had a rough day, it seems Wall Street is as racist as they come. The doormen nazis at his apt decided neither I being the defective girlfriend nor Gabe his other friend who is Spanish and grew up in Harlem area should have the right to grace their lobby with our presence. Apparently yesterday they wanted to run a background check on Gabe. They even asked Gabe "whats up with that guy's girlfriend?" meaning my deaf voice and probably for not wearing 5th ave attire. I am very disappointed for Clyde's sakes as he was so happy to move in there and at that location. This has turned into a bitter experience for all involved. He is now looking to move elsewhere because he's not a superficial person like most of them down there are. That's fine by me, I never liked the area nor did I feel comfortable in that environment where diversity is sneered on and there's little warmth or manners among them. I get treated better in Harlem manner-wise any day of the week then I do down on Wall Street.

Not feeling so great today, dragged myself into work yesterday and ending up cancelling teaching last night. I just wasnt well. I went home and spent the evening reading and on aim with Clyde cheering him up from the incident that occurred at his apt yesterday.

Today I am still tired but I promised Eddie I come in today and now that I am here, they don't need me. I am gonna head back home to bed. I should be back on my feet by tmw. I have to as I am meeting two students tmw to edit their student films.

Tonight I will see Blondie and Szymanski and hang out at Blondie's apt to catch up on the new episodes of Rome :D

FlashKit RULz!

If you ever need sound effects or sound loops for free go to Flashkit and download either the wav files or mp3 files. I havent figured out the mp3 files. I am determine to have the GGG movie ready for Lopez this Monday, no ifs ands or butts. Means I wont get to see my Sweetie much this weekend, I am hoping he can come over Saturday evening and help me polish the sounds before we head back downtown where I will spend the night and we hit a few bookstores the next day. I really want to go to this one called UsedBookCafe located at 126 Crosby Street, NYC 10012, the nearest Subways:W / R to Prince Street; B / D / F / V to Broadway-Lafayette; 6 to Bleecker Street. What's cool is that all of the profits goes to Housing Works that provides numerous services to the HIV/AIDs homeless population. And Eddie, what a sweetheart, got me a book certificate for Barnes and Nobles which is very close by to Clyde's apt.

Speaking of being thrifty, we're both kinda following Keri's influence of NBI (Not buying IT!) because he got hit with an unexpected bill right before the holidays that put a damper on the New Year for him and well, me, I never have enuff money! Just enuff to squeak by and thats only due to Baba's help and support. So I am trying to see if I can find inexpensive ways for us to enjoy each other's company. We have a chess board, skipbo and an 80's/90's trivia game that I brought him for the holidays recently. Plus we're both movie buffs and he has all the paid channels so that saves us a few pennies here and there.

As for Wednesday night's ASL class, my supervisor is gonna wait 1 more week to see if the number of enrollment increases otherwise I gotta wait till the Spring quarter to teach ASL II on Wednesdays. Luckily for me Eddie is cool letting me work 8 hrs on Wednesdays so I can get in 16 hours a week on Mondays and Wednesdays.

I left my new PSP at Clyde's place, bummer because I was itching to play video games last night. I also had a major bout of insonmia where I was up till 7am, just couldn't sleep. Nothing upsetting happened recently but every few months, I suffer a few days of not sleeping much or at all. I got about 5 hours of sleep before coming to work today. I am not much use for lesson planning, luckily I did most of it this past Monday, whew!

Tonight I will go over to Szymanski's new pad and check out her roommate who may be slightly OCD and well psycho. I'm curious to meet her myself. My roomie L is cool, she and I respect eachother's space and its easy to hang out with her or not to hang out with her. She's hardly been home, working hard as a flight attendant. Hmm I never thought I would end up rooming with someone who does that for a living. Its kinda one of those things where you always wondered what the people who serve you on the plane do in their free time. The answer? SLEEP, their hours are majorly screwy and my roommate sleeps for a few hours at a time due to the numerous shifts she accepts.

Dates to bookmark or red-ink on your calendar



January 28, 2007 the 4th season of The L Word with Marlee Matlin and Jon Wolfe Nelson. This is only on ShowTime (paid channel) and the show deals with issues of GLBT, focuses primarily on the Lesbian community. I love the show but if you're not ok with GLBT then I wouldn't advise this as a show for you.

March 21st, 2007 PBS will air a 2 hour documentary that explores the past 200 years of the Deaf life in America. I am hoping to record it. It would be a good resource for future ASL classes that I teach. I just hope it doesn't come off making us look inept or invalids. Thats my biggest fear when it comes to tv and deaf related issues. Hollywood has failed us so many times but PBS is pretty reputable. Now if only the TLC would do a reality show called "Living in the Deaf World" like their other show Little People, Big World that shows the lives of a family made up primarily of Little People.



Alrighty, I am outta here :)

Me and my DEAF ways!

This past weekend was pretty easy going, the cold weather made me want to hibernate. Saturday Clyde and I helped King and Joe Joy with their video project. Basically I was a last minute stand in because two other actresses cancelled due to conflicts. So the of us emailed, txt and pleaded for more actors to come but Clyde came and saved the day! My scene basically involved me falling down the stairs. No I didnt actually fall but "fake fall" which still banged me up pretty good and not to mention the cold only made my muscles ache more. It was rewarding to work with King and Joe Joy. They both are so reliable and hard working. And BIG THANKS to Clyde for the last minute stand in as well.

The other major issue came up this weekend is my "deaf identity" and how I felt I was not being seen as a deafie but rather as a HOH/oralist. I felt it was tearing my relationship apart and I care deeply for Clyde. While I don't deny that I do use speech and my hearing aid to help with communication among non-signers, my heart beats to a deaf drummer. My cultural tendencies reflect the deaf community. At the end of the day, I am deaf.

I explained that HOH is part of the deaf community but when I am always speaking and listening, my identity was being ignored and this caused me much distress with my relationship with Clyde. I feel this is a major part of why I got so depressed because it took me many years to be ok with myself and to accept my deafness. That I want to continue this way. But by him not acknowledging I am culturally deaf (he knows I cant hear pathologically) and treating me as such, it makes me feel lousy. Like that part of me isnt good enough and should be hidden. I don't want that. The best analogy I can think of is when a gay child comes out to his parents and then his parents treat him the same as before, as a straight person and ignores any comments related to his gay identity it can eat away at that person.

And I dont expect Clyde to become a champion signer nor go to deaf rallies and become a member of NAD. But to use more visual communication with me, ASL and to honor and respect my culture and how I do things. I don't blame Clyde for this at all, his experiences with the deaf community has been lukewarm and thats putting it midly (pun intended).

First he had to deal with the lack of patience deafies have with new signers. That while they do pay attention it only lasts for a few minutes before some other conversation (other deafies signing) intriques them more that they look away and Clyde feels he is being interrupted. This is an example of deaf/hearing differences. Deaf use their eye gaze to show who has predominance of the topic of conversation. We are constantly interrupting each other when a bunch of deafies get together.

Then there was the "do-gooders" people learning ASL to "help" the deaf community and would badger Clyde about what a great person he is for learning ASL and what an inspiration it is that he is dating a deaf woman *retches* we both don't like that bullshit. He is only learning ASL for me, to communicate with me. Not to earn brownie points. He got tired of meeting non-signers or hearies who proclaim they know the constant struggles deafies face. How it hurts and is a strain for us to listen and speak. That all things hearing are BAD.

Lastly the fact that well meaning friends of mine try to tell him to sign more or correct his signing. He feels that when they make an effort to speak, hes not jumping in there, giving speech lessons, so to ease up on the ASL criticism. He's right because lingusitic research shows that it is more important to grasps the concept at first and then iron out the details later. If you constantly stop a new signer to correct them, all youre doing is upsetting them, causing them to forget what they were trying to say. If at the end of the conversation you want to give feedback to his signing. You should ask first because unwanted advice is a major source of annoyance and only makes him want to run in the other directions when deafies are around. Besides there is no time table for how quickly or slowly a person learns to sign. What counts for me is the effort and practicing the signs on your own time.

On a different note, there's a great link that allows you to make crossword puzzles for your students for free. It seems my ASL II wednesday class that I am to teach may be cancelled, bummer but if so I will just work more hours as a media tech on wednedays.

I have been lazy with finding sounds for my GGG movie :( Part of it is not having internet at home and part of it seems I have lost my new USB disks which sucks cuz they are not cheap!

Earlier today Szymanski stopped by and we spent a few hours catching up. She is still settling into her new apt and I hope things go smoothly for her from now on. After work tonight I will head downtown to see my sweetie who's making me supper. Its nice having someone look out for me and want to take care of me, even if I don't always appreciate it I know how lucky I am.

League of Hard of Hearing

Don't know how many of you grew up watching Mork and Mindy show? Kinda feeling like Mork from Ork. My brain is a little fried from teaching almost 6 hours today. Glad the work week is almost over.

When I wake up I will go to the LHH (League of Hard of Hearing) to pick up a new earmold. Funny, one of Clyde's friends asked if LHH is where all of the deaf people hang? Like its a social spot for deaf gatherings. When my boyfriend replied no, it provides various services for deafies, hoh and the senior citizen crowd with their own hearing needs. He then explained that I am involved with the "Deaf Community." His friend replied, "Thats too bad, League of Hard of Hearing" sounds better. It actually sounds like a squad of super heroes ready to defend HOH from deafies who don't think we're deaf enuff or hearies who don't think we try hard enuff.

I am looking forward to February when I will go to PA for Baba's bday the 1st weekend. Then the 2nd weekend to DC where I hope to see Zaxy, Peep, Karen, Demon, Trotto and a few others.

Funny, Clyde is a diehard NYer. I tease him and say he doesn't have a heart but instead an apple beating inside of him. We have been doing well. I still get frusturated by our communication breakdowns and cultural differences. There oughta be a manual guide on deaf/hearing relationships dos and donts. Like do expect the hearing person will not fall in love with the deaf world. Another example would be don't expect the deafie to always be willing to speak, talk, listen, read lips, mime, interpretive dance.... instead of using ASL.

Here are 2 stories on deaf/hearing relationships, the 2nd one I definitely felt hit closer to home (everything except the deaf woman reading skills and educational level).

deaf and hearing
We Listened To Ourselves

HeadSpace

Its bitterly cold would be an understatement, the winds and the chill factor is below freezing temperatures! Braved the cold today in Queens. I am ready to dig out my phat matrix coat.

Last Saturdays' shoot went really well. The students did a great job and we did two different short stories. Both Clyde and King helped out that day. It was cool for Clyde to meet a HOH person who is oral and NOT involved in the Deaf community. He was surprised at how she went out of her way to reassure him she was just like him in her ability to hear. So he asked her, if its crowded can you hear well? She replied no. When you watch TV do you use Caption? She said yes. But still she was adamant about her "hearing" identity. Luckily there were two other HOH students who both speak and sign so she had the opportunity to meet other students like herself. I know how she feels, to be ashamed to be deaf. Like her when I was a kid, I hated when people noticed that I "talked funny" and I wouldnt wear my hair in a ponytail because I didnt want anyone to see my hearing aid. Nyhoo, it was a big success and I look forward to meeting with the 2 group leaders to edit their stories.

Sunday Clyde and I helped Szymanski with two car trips to her new apt. which is very nice. It seems ASSwipe (my old roommate) has gone bonkers on her too! Does it ever end? She spent the night at my apt and we yakked till 5am. Clyde really made an effort to sign and he's doing a great job. He's a perfectionist so it frusturates him not to be able to sign everything at once. But without signing some of the time, you can never master signing regularly. Szymanski made a good point how deafies often say "what did you say?" or "can you write that down?" so why should it be any different for a non-singer to let the signer know "slow down I don't understand" or "please sign that again".

Yesterday for MLK day I stayed home and worked on lesson plans and cleaned the apt.. I also worked on the 1st movie with adding voice overs and subtitles. Now the only thing left is to add music and sound effects and I am done! I was planning to do that tonight but frankly I am exhausted from a long day of teaching and the cold weather outside.

I havent been as depress as much lately. By coming out and admitting to my friends, family and sweetie it lifted a big weight off of my shoulder. King and I were talking Saturday about SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) and how it impacts many people in NYC. I admit in the summer time I have a LOT more energy then the winter so I am tempted to try to work on a project with Clyde to build a light box that is used for "light therapy." I wonder if it would work?

On Sunday I started to watch a movie called HeadSpace but didnt get to finish it. It looks pretty good, kinda like a psychological type movie. Hey Sharpe have you seen that one? I read up on the reviews for the sequel for "28 days later" and the director from the 1st movie refused to direct the followup sequel. Not sure how good it will be?

Finally got my 1st movie back last night from the special effects editor Hinterlang :) Now I can go ahead and add the voice overs and subtitles, lastly sound effects wheeeee! I should have a finished bit by Monday/Tuesday.

Got called into work today as a technician. Basically it was going around to the various classrooms and replacing power strips, making sure the wiring is right, replacing overhead projectors with new bulbs, VERY BORING but heck, its some money. Besides Eddie was so glad I came in because the other worker hurt his knee playing football last weekend. The school here is basically dead, only adminstrative folks and some students strolling about.

Now I am off to the $1 store for paper plates and cups for this weekend's shoot. I just plan to serve fruits and donuts with OJ in the a.m.. And order a couple of Pizzas for mid afternoon plus buy a cake (1 of my student's birthday is the same day as the shoot). I am really looking forward to this gig Saturday. The last time I shot any footage was in May/June last year. I aching to make more deaf films.

28 Days Later

Tonight was probably my toughest ASL class by far. A pair of 3 year olds, one boy and one girl. Cute as buttons :D But of course as many people know toddlers and preschoolers have extremely short attention spans. I must make a note to pick up some flash cards with pictures before I meet with them again. I am happy because I was able to set up my work schedule so I am working the same days and times.

Last night watched 28 Days Later. Its probably the closest thing to horror films as I get. People know I hate Horror films, esp the hack and slash type where a group of people get eliminated one by one. The only reason I can stomach the movie as it involves a plague/virus type event in a major urban city. I have always been a fan of the "end of the world" type movies. Like Independence Day, Deep Impact, The Core, Outbreak... and so on.

Finished the 3rd tape of PAWs for logging purposes, am happy because by doing so I am already making some decisions as to what scenes to use, which ones not to use. I will admit I prefer my finished product to be as neat as possible in the sense there should never be a "lag" time where the audience has to wait for something to happen or the cuts are too early or too late. Some of the scenes while orginal, not usable. Only 1 mini dv to go and then its on.

January Blues

Been kinda in the dumps the past few weeks. Life sometimes gets me down and I become antisocial and apathetic. Not to worry I don't allow myself to stay that way once I am aware I am depressed. The whole deaf/hearing differences has taken a toll on me as well as trying to find work to support myself and to strike a balance that I can handle.

Next weekend I do have something to look forward to, thats my student's film project. Luckily Knob, King and Clyde will be there as my crew and to be in their movies. Also related to film making I have been using the "alone time" to log the rest of PAWs movie footage. I want it finished before I go to DC in Feb.. *keep your fingers crossed*

Came across two interesting websites during the past week or so. One is called New York Song Line where you can look up your street or location and find out interesting tidbits of history about it. The second site is called HopStop which is great for NYers because often time when entering an address in Yahoo maps or Mapquest they do not list what subway stops are near the address and it makes it hard for pedestrians like myself to figure out which trains to take, luckily this site can help! Good news you can use this site in several major cities like San Fransico or DC.