Deafening Chameleon

Teak On The Hudson

2012-02-01T00:20:00.004-05:00

Teak On The Hudson restaurant/bar aesthetics are unbelievably GOOD!, I am so glad Red Hots took these photos!

Seriously I guesstimate the fish tank that holds numerous Koi fishes to be ya-30 to 40 feet long and probably at east 5 feet from top to bottom!

A magazine worthy shot taken by Red Hots :]

The decor is BEAUTIFUL! Sorry this shot do

Red Hots + Me = *sizzles!*

Blondie and Me, as cute as can be for Besties!

Happy Kitty

2012-01-30T01:22:00.001-05:00

Tom aka Bastard Kitty chillaxing!

Fed up with 'doing the right thing'

2012-01-25T23:33:00.003-05:00

So now I am torn between a major decision on whether or not to accept a 3rd job that would add 2 more classes to my work load of 5 already existing classes. Plus I would be taking an approximate $15 an hour pay cut from my current minimum hourly earnings which is making the job offer a LOT less appealing. Toppled with the fact I have to once again give up my evenings and for the 1st time in years I have my evenings back except for 1 night a week, which is tonight. The commute will be hell too...
BUT
It would be serious extra income and help me to pay off bills especially my state taxes which in a double edge sword kind of way could actually make worse....Plus its the responsible thing to do, take the job.
I just am torn and not at all enthusized with being paid less than I deserve :/ DO-DO?

Club Photos!

2012-01-23T17:28:00.004-05:00

Me and Goddess Rose enjoying the 1st snowfall for NYC 2012 after a fun night!

Celebrating Phil Jean's bday! The Gays always bring the glitz and glam!

Me and Goddess Rose with Phil & F13!

Look out Boy George, you can't top this!

Gotta love NYC dance crowd, seriously some of the nicest people you ever want to meet!

Self-pity need not apply here

2012-01-22T19:35:00.007-05:00

There are two kinds of people in the world; those who make do and those who don't but sit around and complain about it. I prefer to be in the company of the 1st group. The type that deals with the hand they're dealt and can still find an ounce of happiness somewhere in their day. The 2nd group I avoid like the plague! The self made victims who whine about their woes and snarl at others when they are smiling or being kind. Don't get me wrong, I don't mean to say one should go through life with denying the truths of the world out there no matter how ugly. But you don't have to sit and marinate in it either.

For those who chose to be victims and not do ANYTHING to help yourself I want you to know, you certainly won't win awards for the countless hours spent pouting or being sullen. The only person who's truly suffering is yourself or the other people around you who put up with it just because they love you. You don't grow old and think back in to your life and feel proud of the days wasted being miserable. As a matter of fact you probably won't grow old because misery is stress to your body and more than likely you'll die sooner rather than later. You won't suddenly one day be happy because this happened or that happened because happiness doesn't come from the outside. It has to come from you and your insides, how you FEEL about YOU? And if you don't like how YOU FEEL then there are countless ways to change who you are or the life you are living. Books, religious or community mentors, friends, family, counseling, medication, exercise and a personal favorite of mine altruism. Helping others helps you. You learn humility, compassion and the common ground you share with another living person or being (pets, wildlife, plants). Doing GOOD feels GOOD.

I know I know! how did I get to here from there (seriously last fall was a tough time for me, still reeling from the breakup, leaving school, financial woes, etc., etc..read any post from Sept '11-early Dec '11) I truly thought this is it for me. I won't recover from this, I couldn't even smile much anymore. But time passes and I made choices and stuck with those choices. Its hard to be disciplined when you're depressed, I know its hard for me too. But if you stick to your resolve to change things, it happens quite slowly at first and then all of a sudden a snowball effect occurs and you're suddenly where you want to be. This is how I feel these days. I feel like I am in such a great place in my life.

I started off healing my wounds with those cheesy self inspirational quotes that I wrote on post it notes and places in random places in the apartment. I admit when I saw them in other peoples homes I always thought to myself how lame! But which is lamer? Looking dorky to a couple of people who you trust? Or being the debbie downer, the stick in the mud at every gathering? So did I look at these quotes everyday? No, not really as a matter of fact I stopped seeing them and occasionally forced myself to stop and re-read them. But what I did find myself doing was thinking about these quotes in my head at one part or another of my day and it slowly changed my mindset. Then sometimes when I went back to re-read these post-its, some of them were no longer applied to me. Because either I already incorporated the sentiment/mindset or it simply served just to boost me up and I no longer needed the pep talk. It felt good to crumble the post it notes into a ball and throw it away. Like I had mastered it or no longer needed the little pick-me-up crutch.

During my active attempt to heal and feel better, I generally reach out to my friends and family and shared with them my feelings (good or bad). Baba probably gave me the best piece of advice which was don't be so hard on yourself and just give yourself time to heal. You need to heal first. See here the key point is to give yourself TIME to HEAL. Not TIME alone, you don't need more time doing nothing or more of the same, you need TIME to HEAL (CHANGE) which means making a commitment to yourself to do just that. For me that meant finally making my apartment into a home because this is your sanctuary, your escape from the world when you're too tired or beaten down. On those days where everything has gone wrong, one should be able to come home and feel good, relax and calm and if possible, happy too? It took a LOT of time to make my apartment into a home for me and Tom. And thanks to Blondie being there for me and helping me on 3 separate occasions while I worked on the place in between her visits, I now PAH have the 'ahhh' feeling when I walk in the door. Plus I love sharing my home with Tom aka my Bastard Kitty, I actually make sure to come home every night to sleep in my bed and be with my Tom Tom. I joked recently on FB after I uploaded a photo of Tom Tom that he's all the man I need! I no longer allow a TV, computer or phone in my room. The only electronics in there is my alarm clock and that's just because I can't wake up on my own. My bedroom is now a place of rest, sleep and reading. Which also helps with feeling like this is my perfect little home! So finally being able to enjoy my apartment has added tremendously to my overall well being and I try not to take it for granted.

I also decided to heal myself by changing how I eat. I have been since last fall adding more and more healthy food to my diet on a day to day basis. I already love fruit but have been working on adding more veggies and I stay away from a lot of the process food I used to eat (not 100%) like I still use an occasional pasta mix from a box but things like snack foods/desserts (junk food) I have stopped buying for the most part, including chocolate which I used to eat EVERYDAY but only in the past 3 weeks have I broken that habit. I also just have become more fussy about what I am willing to eat. I won't eat something just to please someone else or go with the herd mentality. I only eat if I LOVE it and I feel it does something good for my body such as fruit I know is rich in so much that I feel GOOD when I consume it. I am still quite a meat eater that will never change but the amount and frequency has. I also pay close attention to water and have drastically reduced my diet coke intake which used to be less than a half a can a day but now I drink it every few days. I mostly drink water (sometimes with a lemon), seltzer water, cranberry juice and occasional diet coke or ginger ale. I still love Chinese food but do not ordered it very often because the kind I like to eat is not under a diet menu anyways.

I have not lost as much weight as I would like but I suspect that is due to the lack of muscle tone which is on my next "to do" list once I am settled into my work routine. Muscles always burns more calories and honestly looks a lot more attractive then fat. Having discovered the love of dancing, I know that at least I am getting my cardio sometime. But weights must be added soon for muscle resistance. What I love about dancing is once you've been dancing for a while you just get lost in the music and find your 'zone' and let go. Its almost meditative when you let your body just take over and basically stop thinking! And just BE! Exhilarating!

FB Drone

2012-01-20T16:30:00.003-05:00

Seriously, I have become another FB drone!!! I love chatting with various people from all parts of my life from the past all the way to yesterday! I think its amazing how technology has shorten the gap for communication between people geographically. Recently I have been trying a few fun apps like one tells you what your NAME says about you. They hit the mark pretty well!

Last night I learned something new. I can love one of my favorite club here in NYC but I won't always love the music or the DJ playing. I can't enjoy repetitive and slow music or feel the desire to DANCE! Live and learn, I am really a ROOTS fan!

In other news I am sooooooooo excited that next weekend Baba and Uncle David will visit me and bring me some furniture as well. But more importantly FAMILY is visiting ME :) How lucky am I?

2012!!!

2012-01-18T22:20:00.008-05:00

Pah! My 1st post for the new year :)
I must say my New Years this year was one of the best ever! I rang in the NYE with my best friend Blondie along with Red Hots, Little Orphan Annie and some other cool folks. The gays outnumbered the straights. FUN! It was exactly what I was in the mood for a HOUSE partay with an Omega backyard too.

Here's me and Red Hots *sizzle!*

Chasity & Red Dog!
They'd make a handsome couple if they were straight but instead they make a sexy Gay couple!

On New Years Day I dance my tush off with Goddess Rose and her man.

Here I am at Pier 94 along with probably 5,000-10,000 other folks dancing away
and having a grand old time!

Me with Goddess Rose who made New Years Day possible!
And infected me with the dancing bug! Thank you, I am loving it!!!

And we got to meet Dean Winters! Yep the hottie from OZ!

Dean was so nice and a real sweetheart! I liked that he was down to earth and just vibing with everyone else. I HEART NYC!!!

I am sooo excited to be dancing near Dean Winters! Of course when he was looking I played it all cool like 'oh I rub elbows with famous peeps all the time! ~ Yeah Right!'

New Years Day that night I changed up my makeup and apparently this is the look I should go for more often! Got a lot of compliments on FB, nice ego boost!

Today was my 1st day back to work and I am glad I only work today and am off the rest of the week. I am still on vacation mode. For fun I included several slides in my powerpoint in which I told students 2 truths and 1 lie. For example I did one where did I ever get a nose job? Did I get LASIK done? Did I wear braces? Of course my nose is au naturel! The one I thought was so interesting was the question where I asked which of these 3 actors have I met? JC Chasez? Johnny Galecki? Dean Winters? In both of my classes today more people thought I had never met Dean Winters compared to the other two. I guess everyone wants to meet the man who played O'Reilly! It was fun to show them the next slide with Dean's photo and JC Chasez from back at MSSD days I think 1991 or 92?

I just dig meeting celebrities, my goodness I've met quite a few like Henry Wrinkler the FONZ, Cynthia Nixon, David Blaine, and many supporting actors too. I think its inevitable if you live in a big city like this one! I even shook hands with Richard Nixon who having shook many other Deafie's hands during a field trip to the capitol was shocked when I replied "I am doing well!" Cuz as he shook hands with each student he say the same thing "how ya doing?" then shake the next hand and most of my peers didn't verbally respond till I did ;P They weren't exaggerating his nose in those cartoons I kid you not!

Also Blondie, god bless her helped me get my apartment all squared away finally! I can't ever thank her enough for all of her help. I was living in a literal pit of despair for 8 months and now my apartment looks like a HOME! I even arranged my books by color as suggested in one article on how to make your bookcase look less cluttered. I've been reading up on feng shui apartment living too. I want one of those zen water fountains as water symbolizes abundance and prosperity. Been scanning on ebay for one that stands out to me and screams BUY ME! You see this year for 2012 I have 2 mottoes

1st motto is "it's all about me baby!" after years of putting everyone ahead of myself, I've decided to give myself the same attention I give others :]

2nd motto is "if I don't absolutely LOVE it, I won't eat it, buy it, wear it, use it..." etc., etc..and so far its working! So until I stumble across my dream water fountain and have the dough to buy one (I don't want anything terribly expensive or large but soothing and pleasing to the eyes).

Now my dream WANT is a product made by a company called CONMOTO which makes a product called RollFire! A portable fireplace but the price tag on this starts at about $3700! I want I want I want!

Seriously how cool would that be to have in your home? So sleek and trendy and best of all FIRE my favorite element! I guess being a fire sign and having a deep respect for FIRE both its ability to destroy as well as create to me is just inspiring! No worries I am not a pyromaniac :-] According to Feng Shui FIRE symbolizes energy and passion. And it is suggested it not be used too much in the bedroom as it is a place of rest but if properly situated it can bring romance to your life. Right now I am boycotting men and romance in favor of my 1st motto this year. Perhaps in 2013 I'll want to date but right now I am enjoying my life too much to play house again anytime soon!

Okay I've yammered on enough. Hopefully things will keep going well as they have been and I have to say I haven't been this happy and content in so long its nice to be back! As Baba used to say a Shakespeare quote "to thy own self be true" and baby I am doing that!

My mini-vacation

2011-12-21T15:22:00.018-05:00

Blondie and I escaped the concrete jungle clutches recently and headed upstate to a bed and breakfast (B&B) called Mariaville Lake B&B located close by to Schenectady. I found a good deal for this B&B on Lifesta, a website for people who want to re-sell their groupons, living social or other online deals previously brought. Unfortunately I brought it in early November and it was to expire by 12/31/11 which did not give me much time to pick a date when and all the weekends were already booked. After much thought and back and forth with Blondie we decided to go on Sunday 12/18 & Monday 12/19 for those 2 nights.

We met up on Sunday early afternoon and loaded up the car, got on the road and the trip itself took less than 3 hours! Beautiful drive along I-87. We arrived and the owner of the BB name Rick was there to greet us with crinkly eyes and a huge grin, such a nice man. He welcomed us and gave us a tour of the B&B.

The view from the front of the house

The dinning room where we ate breakfast the 2nd morning

This here was a small patio facing north I suppose? but this picture doesn't do the room justice, I should've taken this picture again yesterday when it wasn't so cloudy for better lighting. Here is where we ate breakfast cooked and served by Rick himself. By the way the 1st breakfast on Monday morning was so damn delicious! Rick started us off with a small plate of cut up strawberries and pineapple. Along with some kind of filo pastry topped with maple butter mixed with large dried cranberries/cherries I don't know what it was but damn I was loving every small bite I took! Then he served us I think it was a souffle or perhaps quiche along with a few strips of bacon and mango juice (which for me was too sweet but I had tea to help quench my thirst). The 2nd breakfast I did not care for but that was a personal preference not because what he made wouldn't be tasty for other folks. I think next time if I go back I will simply ask for a regular breakfast because Rick did ask us if we had any food allergies and probably we could've told he what we would prefer to eat but we didn't think of it at the time. We thought we would be given a choice for breakfast but no matter live and learn.

The view from the patio on the 1st morning but it was cloudy that day so again this photo doesn't really accurately show how beautiful the area really is!

The staircase that leads to the front door of the B&B. On the left is the dinning room with the huge mirror. On the right is the living room with the fireplace where Blondie and I spent our evenings at.
Upstairs 2nd floor where the guest rooms were. The first entrance by the step was the hallway that lead to the back of the house. This hallway is kind of long with several bends and turns. I joked to Blondie as Rick led us through the maze where our room was that I would need a map to find my way around. In the picture above the next entrance lead to the Vineyard room. And where I am standing taking the photo is where the Lakeview room is.

We were told we were the only guest for the night and we had the whole place to ourselves. We got to see the rooms and I was glad I picked the Country room because it had a single bed and a queen size bed as well as a mini fridge and tv (sadly no CC for that tv but the common area downstairs with a tv did have CC if we wanted to use it but we never did). My other top choices included the Lakeview room but decided against it because it faced east and I did not want to be woken up at the crack of dawn bombarded by sunlight. But still a magnificent room don't you think?

My other top room choice was the Vineyard room (or as Blondie and I called it the Lavender room) absolutely gorgeous and girly too!

When Blondie and I saw this room we both gushed how pretty it was and how much we liked the room but I am glad we didn't pick this one as its really good for either 1 person or a couple in love and on top of each other ;)

The Vineyard room also faced East or the front of the house and was across the hall from the Lakeview room.

Our room was called the Country room, a bright yellow room with almost an L shape design. There was a ceramic bunny on the desk in our room that I thought could use a holiday makeover. What do you think?

After we settled in with our bags we knew that on a Sunday night it would be pretty low key all around. We chose a Thai restaurant located I guess what is downtown Schenectady not far at all from the B&B. Since it was night time it was a pretty drive away from the Maria Lake passing all residents houses with holiday decorations. We found the place thanks to the GPS Baba had given me a while back and to our surprised as we walked in the place looked like a redneck bar or a bar you find in my hometown and Blondie at first thought we went into the wrong place! But I told her no its the Thai place where there's a bar when you first walk in and the dinning area is adjacent to it. I think we both we're expecting an Asian theme decor from the way the menu looked but I guess we forgot we're no longer in our urban city. Suffice to say the food was DELICIOUS! YUM YUM! After we ate we found a convenient store and brought some alcoholic beverages like Mike's Hard Lemonade. I personally really liked Mike's Classic Margarita Raspberry flavor, while Blondie stuck with Mike's Hard Pink Lemonade. Before we left Rick offered to set up the fireplace in the living area so when we got back we could hang out by the fire which we did :) Me enjoying our 1st night :)

Here's Blondie laughing at my dry sense of humor and enjoying the warmth from the fire

Fire

Blondie looking regal as usual ;P

We talked for hours and then went to bed. The next day we got up for the 1st breakfast and then went back to bed till 1 or so. After we got up and ready we had discussed the night before about where we wanted to go or do? We both need new threads and I came up with the idea of thrift shopping. Plus we asked Rick where people like to go when shopping in the older parts of the city? Like in DC there's Georgetown, in NYC there's so many places like St. Marks, Union Square and in Schednetcdy its called Jay street. Before we left we snapped some photos by the front of the B&B

Reindeer!

First we went to three stores all in the same location. 2 were really nice, young hipsters consignment shops and another was just a discount store. I found a 2 tops and Blondie found a really nice sweater. After that we headed to a large Goodwill where again I scored 2 shirts and Blondie found some antique ornaments. Then we headed to Jay street which was in the same area we had drove around in the night before for the Thai place. And lucky was right around the corner from Bomber's Burritos Bar which we already planned to eat at and drink Margaritas! Jay street was cute most of the shops and cafe closed at 6 so we didn't really do any shopping there, that's ok there wasn't anything I saw that disappointed me and its very small strip of shops. We headed to Bombers with our Holiday antennas. We decided to share a pulled pork burrito and wings and each got a margarita, mine san salt. Oh my god, the burrito was the best I EVER HAD! I kid you not! I was just so surprised at how good it was and the place was really cute set up and people looked like they were having fun. We enjoyed Bombers a LOT. Then we headed back to the B&B and asked Rick if we could have 1 more fire? He said no problem and set it up for us and Blondie drank wine and we gabbed till very late!

I learned that using my phone camera mode to take a self portrait works only if you have good lighting because while the phone camera has a flash, its only on one side. For self portraits no flash.

I thought this was a nice shot of me and Blondie, 2 women on a night on the town!

More Fire

Yeah we look tired from staying up too late but damnit, it was FUN!

Funny the next day we headed down to Albany for lunch and to see the other "must see" spot called Lark Street. There was another Bombers Burrito Bar here and I thought their window display was quite cute!

We walked up and down Lark Street which was mostly tattoo shops, head shops, cafes and gift shops. In one really funky gift shop I spotted a cool "Day of the Dead" type skull that I brought as a souvenir of my trip upstate. Outside this shop was a xmas tree which I thought was cleverly designed!

Monopoly money, what a brilliant idea! And a good fit for these hard economic times!

And the Bingo card man cut outs, too adorable!

I also spotted 2 signs that I had to snap!

They say you can take the girl out of Lancaster but well you know the rest....

I know I know this is for but as a sci fi geek of Battlestar Galatica I just this was frakking cool!

We found an Indian place that had a lunch buffet and the food was excellent! The waitress there was kind enough to explain some of the key ingredients or flavors used in Indian dishes and wrote them down for me.

Once we finished lunch we ambled back to the highway and headed back to NYC. It was a wonderful mini vacation and if I hadn't needed to return by dinner time to give my students their final exam we would've stayed longer. I just really enjoy visiting a new place and getting out of the city was very much needed. It gave me and Blondie time to really talk and take stock of our lives, what we've done and what we hoped to do. I highly recommend this B&B to anyone visiting the Albany or Schenectedy area.

Snowball vs Avalanche, Avalanche wins!

2011-11-18T15:59:00.003-05:00

Lately I've been using an app called Mint, it keeps track of your spending habits and balances. Not bad but could be better. Yesterday I decided to sit down and go through my finances because this year I am being hit with both school loans, state tax debt and other frivolous bullshit from 1 government agency who's name shall not be mentioned as Baba likes to say. I created 3 tables, the 1st table lists all my debts (Loans, CC, State Taxes...). 2nd table lists all of my recurring monthly bills (Rent, Internet, netflix, electric/gas...) and 3rd table lists all of my monthly expenses (Gas, Food, other)

In the 1st table I listed the balances, APR%, the minimum payment due and how much I pay in interests monthly. Since I have 5 major debts with various balances and APRs I was clueless as to which of these debts to focus paying off first? I had read online and been told in person that you're suppose to pay off your smallest balance first and work your way up to the bigger ones. Problem is I am more concerned about the interests being charged than paying off the smallest balance. This is known as the debt-snowball method, paying off your smallest debts 1st.

However I am more attracted to the idea of doing a debt-avalanche method where as stated on Debt Tips With the debt avalanche method, you pay off the highest interest rate first, and then keep going downhill (like an avalanche) with the next highest interest rate. This deAfinitely makes more sense and I have used several online debt calculators and I recommend using one called What's the Cost?. If you chose the interest option that's the avalanche method, if you chose the balance order that's the snowball method. According to this calculator I will be debt free in 8-9 years and will have paid about 8-9K in interest by using the avalanche method. This is somewhat depressing but not unbearable. I feel like I finally have a plan to get myself out of debt and yeah I'll be close to 50 when I am done but so what. Better late than never right! I am going to commit myself to the repayment plan and see it through. I should if I do the plan have paid off 2 CC within 10 months. This will give me a sense of victory! Next after I get home tonight from the adjunct dinner and lecture, I think I will make me some pie charts of the present and projected debt reduction! Then tape em to my wall so I have visual reminders to help me stay on track.

And speaking of staying on track, I have been pretty good about maintaining my daily commitment to eat at least 1/3rd-1/2 of my food be veggies or fruit. No way could I become a vegetarian because I love meat too much but I can be healthier.

Shabbat Shalom, the Sabbath is upon us, have a good evening everyone!

Your body is your Temple

2011-11-15T23:10:00.004-05:00

I have always made a concious effort to include fresh fruits but not so much veggies in my diet. Lately though I've doubled my fruit intake and have added more veggies to my everyday eating habits and guess what? I feel fuller overall and am eating less. Amazing! I think the key to eating lots of raw fruits and veggies is to mix it up. Like this week there is a sale on berries (Blue, black & raspberries) so I've been eating that nightly with lots of whipped cream (low cal and taste so good with the berries mixed up). Ive also been eating more raw carrots, cucumbers and tomatoes plain or with hummus. I tried them with home made guacamole but the flavor gets blurred so instead I've been snacking the guacamole on organic tortilla chips, yummy. Plus I got mangoes and some tangerines along with banana on hand for snacks. I am pretty proud of myself for making these changes, I am sure my waistline which is quite bloated from a lot of the process food I've eaten during the very stressful times will slim down. I already feel more healthy even tho I had a cold over the weekend it was gone in 2 days with no lingering effects. I am determined to be healthier all around. As we Jews like to say our body is our Temple.

In other news Canstruction this year bombed and not in a good way. I was so disappointed with the lackluster variety of sculptures, I assume its a reflection of the economy? Same thing when I went to the Greek Bazaar this year, the one room called the Attic where church members donate things to be sold (yard sale style) is usually packed with stuff but this year it was bare and slim pickings. I think both me and Nancy were surprised. Again symbolic for the hard times our country is going through.

My friend had her baby boy last night, how thrilling for her and her husband. I am looking forward to seeing her in the hospital on Thursday. She will be released on Friday and is staying due to recovering from a C-section. After my anatomy courses, I have a lot of reservations about C-sections because you are literally cutting through four layers of abdominal muscles. Not good and I only imagine quite painful. It will be good to see her post pregnancy and its an exciting time all around. Also my friend Ronnie got engaged over the weekend too. Her fiancee contacted me about a month ago to invite me to the engagement party (in Maine) but due to lack of funds and time I had to decline. However a bunch of us here in NYC made a cute congratulatory video which Ronnie loved, Whee! And Baba has awesome news as well, there is a strong possibility she will get to move into a retirement community that is the Ritz Carlton or Waldorf of my hometown.

Lastly filming that tanker fire on the nj turnpike was an amazing experience in itself. Witnessing that raw level of energy with my own eyes and feeling the heat searing my skin nearby insane! I am almost to 3,000 views in 7 days. The 1st 2 days after I posted the video is when I got the highest volume of hits. And my video was featured on channel 7 ABCnews in all of their news reports of the day (noon, 5pm, 6pm & 11pm) and I was able to see it at the 5pm showing and Car-man saw it earlier that day at noon and told me about it.

Still tending my wounds

2011-11-11T17:31:00.001-05:00

So its been a weird breakup for the past 1/2 year. We did not make a clean break but have seen one another on and off due to exuinating circumstances. At times it feels bittersweet but most of the time it feels damaged beyond repair. The whole "let's be friends" never really works if you ask me.

On to other news, I have a fun weekend planned. Tonight off to Westchester to visit Little Racoon's Mama. Tomorrow meeting Red Hots, Blondie, Little Orphan Annie, Car-Man, perhaps the Russian Spy too? We will go to the annual Canstruction event, where a showcase of sculptures made entirely from cans is on display. The admissions cost? 1 donated can of food. How can anyone beat that? All the cans are donated to food banks. This will be my 2nd or 3rd time I think?

Today is Veterans day and having a grandfather (WWII) and 2 great grandfathers (WWI) serve the USA in the past reminds me that we shouldn't take our civil liberties for granted. Thank you all to the fine Men & Women who help protect our country and freedom from tyranny. Without your loyalty, we would not enjoy the democratic life we have today! America is not perfect but she mighty damn fine and my personal top pick in all the world to live in!

On Par with Code of Harry

2011-11-04T19:54:00.006-04:00

So Red Hots reminded me I broke one of my own codes (hey if Harry from Dexter gets to have a set of codes, why can't I?) one of them is to use codenames for my friends. Red Hots being just that, demanded I use one for my blog as I do everyone else. She's right, I am still me, sure I was down for the count. But being older doesn't mean having to be so serious!

Welcome Red Hots, we hope you like it here :D

Halloween '11

2011-11-04T00:32:00.008-04:00

Blondie, Red Hots, Little Orphan Annie and I celebrated Halloween by feasting on Chinese food, pumpkin pie, candy apples and all other kinds of junk food that we really shouldn't eat but did anyways. Poor Little Orphan Annie was not able to partake in the face makeup portion of the evening due to work early the next morning, but here are the belated late 70s, early 80s inspired Halloween photos :)

Dunno what we were looking at but we're happy BFF forever (coined circa 1980s!)

Having an "Oh" moment if you will

I don't know why but this photo of Red Hots creeps me out, like some kind of neurotic monk or something?

Oooooh look at the pretty and I bet tasty for monsters, candy corn fingernails!

Blondie enjoying her albino 'Bianca' pumpkin

Watch out Lees press on nails!

Me signing PUMPKIN

a Star is born in the universe every second they say

Girls still wanna have fun!
*psst* Red Hots, you can't be trying to be a 'Deaf Whisper'!

Blondies attempt to be sexy, me I am trying to be coy, did we pull it off?

Red Hots behind a screen, yep that's where they keep her, for everyone's safety ;P

Who you gonna call? Ghostbusters!

Close up of my infamous overbite, er I mean Kiss inspired star!

Looks like I am about to use the MM "CHA" like that MOUNTAIN BIG (CHA)!

Couldn't Blondie play Queen of the elves or fairy easily?!

Eye see u

Halloween '11 was a "blast from the past, Man!"

The John Maucere Talk Show

2011-10-30T22:10:00.003-04:00

Yesterday for my Halloween weekend I made a new friend visiting from Maine that Ronnie suggested I get to know which I happily did so. We met up in Queens and he brought 2 other friends, one of them I knew superficially from before but have always been fond of him and made a new friend, a man who used grew up in Ireland and moved to the states at age 25. I met all 3 guys at the Queens subway stop 74th & Broadway (Jackson Heights area) by Lexington School for the Deaf. We went to a nice Indian buffet and had a splendid time chatting over dinner. It was nice to be with new people.

Unbelievably it snowed here yesterday and I was grateful for my LL Beans Wellies which kept my toes dried and warm. The snow was BEAUTIFUL and I know many people grumble but not me, its awesome. The ground however was a slushy mess anyone who wasn't wearing some type of water proof shoes would be damned yesterday.

After we ate we headed over to Lexington School for the Deaf to watch The John Maucere Talk Show with Paul Raci. As per usual the show started later than schedule, typical DST (Deaf Standard Time) although they said it was to give people extra time to arrive from the lousy weather. But we all know its because the latecomers are also on DST ;P

What I didn't know about the show was it was suppose to be a David Letterman, Jay Leno type show with the host John Maucere, his "sidekick" a CODA (I think?) terp Paul Raci (like Andy Richter was to Conan O'Brien). You probably recognize Paul from Switched At Birth or as I learned last night is signed SAB. Anyways Paul plays the male terp that follows the character Daphine on SAB when she takes a cooking class at a nearby I think private hearing school. He seems pretty nice and relatable. I had no idea he had a long acting history till I saw his resume on IMDB website but he sure does. John even had his music arena covered by DJ Supalee which was cool cuz I had heard a lot about him over the years.

Back to the show because talk shows often involve a "live studio audience" we became that essentially. They filmed the show which meant stop, start, stop, start. John Maucere is extremely lucky to have David Rivera as his personal cheer leader! I am not sure what his role is called? I guess maybe an MC or the side show performer? On the program he is listed as a Tickler which I have no idea what that means? Jester? Not sure but my point is David Rivera did a FANTASTIC job keeping the energy up and never did he leave us hanging or bored. I give him the award for best performer and entertainer for last night's show. Sorry John, I saw you perform your materials at Deaf Timberfest in PA in 2010 and that was great but last night the oscar goes to Mr. Rivera! I think it was good Mr. Rivera engaged his audience and his ASL skills top-notch, basically its candy for the eyes. Of course the joke I told was too "hearing" but really I was the 1st one to get on the stage and get that ball rolling so I did my part for my fellow Deafies :D

John Maucere also had 2 guests appear, Patty O a sustainable fashion designer who's work I have seen on and off over the years. I would've liked to have seen her clothes showcased over the totes "made from my ex's jeans" which I did think was clever gimmick and of course sustainable, no waste involved. I guess it was just like oh, we only get to see her totes no other items?

The other guest was Sean Berdy who plays Emmet on the TV show Switched at Birth (SAB). It was cute because there were these 4 teenie boopers hearing girls sitting in the right front row, basically his groupie, fan club so cute! Sean reminded me of my old friend JT from MSSD, similar signing style and level of confidence but he comes off nicer person than JT ever was. I got to say Sean is one of the brighter one, I will be curious to follow his career as time goes by and if he along with Katie LeClerc character can help change mainstream audience mindset on what Deaf(ness) is all about? I am hopeful for the 1st time in a long time. When everyone was all ga ga over this show when it first came out. I resisted, all I could think of was the previous attempts of Hollywood on us Deafies and I cringe. I don't think I can ever forgive Kelly Martin for portraying us Deafies as retarded people (yes I say retarded because it was retarded they had her act that way!). God there were scenes where she ran to a piece of clothing and sniffed it! SNIFFED it? like a dog would come on!?! Ugh so I did not see Sean Berdy's show till last month thru netflix and then I became one of the blathering fans of the show SAB on FB! The audience really did treat Sean Berdy like a celebrity, during one short break people rushed to take photos of Sean and John, very interesting. I know Alexa W for many years, met Terrylene, Deanna Bray, worked with Darren F, Flash and many other performers so seeing Sean Berdy did not send me into a fan frenzy mode like I was when I met the magician David Blaine on the train a few years back. Nonetheless I enjoyed seeing Sean on the show and running into old faces with other attendees. In total a good I think 3 hours we sat there but I am glad we did, we got to root each other on. If you get a chance to catch The John Maucere Talk Show with Paul Raci, do so, why should the hearies have all the fun?!

When the show ended and the guys and I said our goodbyes I dropped them off at the trains and headed back to Manhattan to see Blondie but we didn't go out to celebrate Halloween. The weather was lousy and no one really seemed in the mood. That's fine, there is talk of pumpkin carving tmw so I am happy with that.

Ostrich mode

2011-10-16T20:26:00.004-04:00

Blame Pliny the Elder for creating the famous myth of Ostriches burying their heads in the sand when alarmed. According to Wikipedia [Pliny the Elder...] who wrote that Ostriches "imagine, when they have thrust their head and neck into a bush, that the whole of their body is concealed."

Nonetheless, I feel like I am sort of in Ostrich mode where I just am actively not thinking about certain things. Before I had the next 31/2 -4 years of my life planned out and now its all changed! I don't have the motivation to try to figure out my future or whether or not I will return to school? I just don't know? But I am doing a helluva lot better than I was a week ago. My body just doesn't handle stress well, never did and this time its my right trapezius muscle is flaring up almost daily. I literally think to myself, RELAX your shoulders! And I reek of tiger balm which means Tom my bastard Kitty occasionally scowls and scrunches up his little black button nose to show me he doesn't approve of my Tiger Balm scent. But he is never more than 1 or 2 feet away.

Yesterday was Mama Raccoon's baby shower, it went splendidly. Blondie and I made a great team. It was fun to plan this for my friend and it was a healthy distraction. Really it was a great day, the Indian food was good, the company even better. I always say food taste better when you share. The Indian food pleased everyone and afterwards we played a few baby shower games led by moi. Blondie decorated the place like it was a photo out of a magazine. I swear she has the Martha Stewart gene! I also got to see Car-man who is a doll and what I considered one of the most enlightened friend I have.

I will say in regards to this mess known as my life that having more downtime has been wonderful. For the 1st time since moving to my beloved apartment, I have been able to work on it little by little and keep it clean and under control. I am slowly creating a day to day system that works for me and Tom. I noticed lately all I want to do is nest, nest, nest, create a happy, peaceful home, pay my bills, work and spend time with family and friends.

Lastly for those of you Deafies who are history docu-drama freaks like me, I have good news for you! Through Netflix, Caligula staring Malcolm McDowell made in 1979 and is available on DVD but with neither closed captions or subtitles is available online streaming with subtitles! Yay! I watched 1/2 of it earlier today, GOOD. Warning if you're uncomfortable with nudity and downright cruelty, don't watch it but if you're like slighty morbid like me, you are in for a real treat!

Waving a white surrender flag....

2011-10-06T15:13:00.004-04:00

Well I have had my share of bad days, but today is one of the worst by far. I had to drop out of school COMPLETELY for several reasons. One was the lack of support services I desperately needed. And two I had stretched myself too thin to handle teaching 4 classes and taking 2 very heavy courses. To make matters worse, the one course I was taking where I was barely getting by is not an option for me to take solo. Basically the 1st course I dropped must be taken at the same time or prior to the 2nd course that I had intended to keep this semester. I do feel the stress of constantly chasing for support services since last winter was unneeded pressure and eroded my self confidence along with this month's early rejection. Basically my core foundation has been shooken up that its life an aftermath of a hurricane. My insides are all in a knot and my emotions are all over the place. My patience level was at a nil too, the last several weeks I found myself getting ridiculously angry over stupid things that happened to me in the world or with strangers. I hated how I was overreacting to things because I was overtired.

When I made the decision to drop one of my courses 2 days ago I finally found a sense of relief. I did feel like a cop out but people reminded me I was being way too hard on myself. Plus by dropping one of my courses, I would be putting off grad school for a year. Then I told myself, hey this isn't a race. One extra year won't kill you if it helps you succeed in the long run. Here I was relaxing and looking forward to completing my school semester in good academic standing when I recieved the bombshell that the 2nd course would not be an option due to the 1st one. I felt humilated because I already emailed the professor of the course explaining I was withdrawing and stated how I hoped to take the class again this spring. There is NO WAY I will grovel and asked to be readmitted to that class. And I wouldn't have to WD from that class had I gotten the support services I needed and was entitled to since last winter! Ugh I feel SICK and way beyond upset. I've emailed the school's higher ups and explained the situation. I hope somehow this will all be resolved to allow me to return in the spring. And that it isn't all ruined. I have had some friends who also experienced severe discrimination as Deaf college students at hearing colleges/universities with getting the proper support service. I know I am not an isolated case. Nonetheless it still sucks. I just want to crawl into bed and come out next spring! And part of me is getting tired of being repeatedly knocked down, whether its school, work or relationships. I keep bouncing back maintaining the 'can do attitude' but not this time. I am down for the count, complete KO.

Worn down

2011-09-25T22:23:00.004-04:00

My spirits have not completely bounced back to my usual self for the past few weeks. I received a crushing blow to my ego and its kind of making everything feel a lot harder. I know I shouldn't take this particular rejection personally but I do. I keep foraging forward and normally it would help take the sting out of this thorn in my side but this time it isn't. Ugh am I a Debbie Downer or what? I feel like a complainer and I hate complainers!

Anyways for my 1 night of fun, I went waaaaaay downtown Manhattan for the 85th San Gennaro (Italian Festival) with Blondie and Raccoon Mama.

So here's me and Mama Raccoon waiting in line to get into Ferrara's Bakery & Cafe.
Note the bags under my eyes, just lovely, thank you stress!

We ate at the famous Lombardi's pizzeria which I had eaten there once before about 6 years back with the Pateman. I immediately recognized the place and gushed to the girls how good their pizza is! And it was, sure its pricey and for a person like me who isn't a pizza fanatic, this place is GOOD! But still nothing beats Ledo's Pizza back in MD. Sorry NYers, Ledos is still CHAMP of all.

Since it was raining on and off, the crowd wasn't so packed which we appreciated with Raccoon Mama being almost 32 weeks preggars! For desserts we went to the also famous Ferrara's Bakery and Cafe. Raccoon Mama highly recommended their Hot Chocolate as being the best in the world. And she was right! Sinfully delicious. Reminded me a little of the hot stove top chocolate pudding Baba used to make. When the pudding would cool off enough and you pushed back the skin that formed on top, tasting that still warm chocolate pudding was similar to their Hot Chocolate only theirs is creamier with more milk. Their desserts are pretty good too, nothing that makes me want to run back but still for their hot chocolate, hell yeah!

Yesterday and today I've been buried with studies for my 2 exams this week and grading student homework. I haven't been able to find the time to do my lesson plans or study for the quiz tmw night. So tmw afternoon once I've completed my morning exam, I will take care of a few things and study for the quiz. Then tmw night do my lesson plans. Tues squeeze in time between teaching 3 classes to study for my 2nd exam for Wednesday morning. Man I will be ready for a visit to my hometown next weekend. I need the R&R, even tho I will have to study while I am there. Being around Baba and Mom uplifts me as well as the rest of the family whom I probably won't have time to see while I am there :(

Lastly, here's a of Tom that Raccoon Mama took yesterday late morning. She has a program that can change the style of the photo so while Tom looks reddish in this, he's actually Gray with white along the anterior surface. My Bastard Kitty is the best roommate EVER!

Dissection kit

2011-09-14T22:45:00.004-04:00

Yesterday my dissection kit arrived and today I got to use my scapel and forceps on a cadaver. It truly was a neat thing to be able to study the human body like this! Talk about up close and personal. I swear, if I was younger, I would go to medical school and maybe study autopsy. I wish my age wasn't working against me. I really wished I hadn't given up on science like I did when I was younger and allowed it to become a mental block for many years. The appreciation for anatomy was there all along! I just figured my poor science background made it an impossible dream to do anything with mediciene. I just wish I had more time and less debts.

Earlier today I was comparing other OT Master programs in the area and by far, my school is deAfinitely the most hardcore when it comes to their science and training expectations. I appreciate that. I also think I am slowly becoming friends with one physician assistant student who I think is a terrific girl! I met her during my summer A&P II course and I think in the next class I am going to ask her if she would like to study together sometimes or work the labs sometimes? I will say my cadaver crew, there are 5 of us assigned to one body (only the left side, the right side is for a different class) are a nice bunch. I also enjoy this cadaver class because its based on Gross Anatomy (what one can see with the eyes). Nice change of pace from the molecular & cellular level. I do have to worry about the dreaded spinal cord (dura matter etc etc), the plexuses/nerves and a few other areas that I struggled with last semester. I better master it this time around.

I have also decided this semester to seek out study buddies for both of my class as they are so intensive! And 2 off the top of my head (1 from each class) is the girl I mentioned recently and 1 guy from my Monday night's class. Funny cuz they're both so super brainy, but hey so am I! Besides if you want to be the best you have to surround yourself with the best!

On a different note as a Deafie, it is very hard to watch the terps and look at anatomy photos or bodies. Really, by the time the terps finishes spelling a word, they've moved on to the next area of identification. My terps are kick ass that's not the problem its just when one is Deaf, their eyes can only be looking at so many places at the one time! Luckily for me the lab assistant say she would be willing to show me separately and that's a-okay with me. I prefer that so that way I can actually see what's being identified. Let the hearies squirm against one another for a good view, I'll take a different path. I have NO trouble requesting services or informing my professors what I need. For example this semester in both of my courses there are audio based materials. I do not want terps for that, I want the transcript. I want direct translation and I want to be able to review it again and again just like my peers who may chose to listen to the audio files however many times they like.

Also my Monday night class was way cool! I go to practice palpation on the guy who I hope will be my study buddy. Very nice kid, this is our 3rd class together. We had to identify the scapula (lateral border, medial/vertebral border, spine, superior angle, inferior angle, subscapular fossa and acromion which by the way is a little hard to find). I am digging biomechanics! Guess what else? I have to buy some "wife beater" tank tops for this class. As there is a clothing policy and whatever we are studying we must be able touch directly via skin. I will get over my displeasure of wearing these tops because everyone of us has to.

As for my teaching, I feel like I am off to a pretty good start. I am staying ahead of my lesson plans despite having to master a new edition of a curriculum that I was never fond of. And surprisingly my 1 boss speaks highly of me in front of me, so my earlier concerns can be put to rest. Whew!

I was feeling kind of down earlier today but I can't let it stop the momentum. Next course of action is to find study buddies so that I can be on top of my game. I cannot afford mistakes or any grade lower than an A- in both of my classes. Otherwise my chances for grad school acceptance is minimal. Competition is fierce today and I got to beat out I think 80 other applicants. Ugh talk about pressure but its the kind that's only added fuel to this fire!

Failure is not an Option!

2011-09-10T20:25:00.006-04:00

I ordered one of those folding shopping carts a while back and its just been sitting there collecting dust. All because I couldn't figure out how to put on the wheels, which included washers, springs and pins among other things. I am not very good with assembling instructions and did a while back make a 1/2 hearted attempt to assemble this cart. Obviously I did not succeed. I was lazy and waiting on Blondie who is a wizard at assembling furniture to do it for me. She helped me attach my new headboard before I went out of town. And she all by herself put 2 sitting chairs together for a dinning set I ordered along with the cart. Well earlier tonight I wanted to put the cart together and I finally did it! Don't get me wrong, I made a few mistakes and went back to fix them such as forgetting the almighty powerful spring component to the front wheel set. Otherwise the small wheel on the right would roam back and forth, not at all stable without the spring. And the satisfaction of it being done feels good! I know some of you reading out there think I am nuts but as a person with ADD and low frusturation threshold, this counts as a small victory to be happy about :]
Now when I go food shopping I can use this to transport food in and out of my car instead of trying to carry it all from my car or even sometimes from the store. Its so close by it feels silly to drive! Plus it gives me an opportunity to cross the 207 bridge. Too bad there's not a walk way on both sides of the bridge. I would love a north view too not only the south.

Mom's key lime pie was a HIT :) I was relieved Blondie liked it because she is not the type who eats a lot of sweets. Luckily this pie is TART, not sickening sweet.

This week will be my 1st full week...I can already see my 1 anatomy class is going to be extremely time consuming, and from skimming over the syllabus for my other anatomy class that starts this coming Monday, I get the feeling these 2 classes are heavy duty. Luckily for me, I am such a nerd now with my Bastard Kitty Tom here with me that I will do it. I am committed to furthering my potential as a human being and to be financially secure for once in my life with a career I feel matters. If I can help any one ever live their life to the fullest, that's something an OT student like myself can be proud of. I just can't imagine not doing this, as its not an option to fail.

Re-adjusting

2011-09-06T18:34:00.007-04:00

My Bastard Kitty finally graces my home with his presence and its been glorious to have him here. He has never been far from my heart these past almost 4 years while he was at Mom. Never again will I lose my Tom-Tom. I considered him to be my Dæmon (from a book triology written by Philip Pullman called His Dark Materials). Although humans are physically separate from their dæmons, they are metaphysically connected, and most human-dæmon pairs cannot bear to be distanced by more than several yards. Its true because while we have been separated he appears in my dreams, I literally longed for him. I don't remember which one of these books I read, it was only one that Knob raved about and I gave it a shot. Didn't much care for the book, but the dæmon part has stayed with me to this day. And Tom is it.

Earlier today I took my 1st nap in God knows how long? I seriously haven't taken one in probably over a year or two. And it felt good to wake up and see Tom lying next to my head, sprawled out and fast asleep with me. Even now as I blog he's at the edge of my bed keeping an eye on things as that's his job you know. I won't be so lonely studying this semester as I have been in the past.

Today is literally my last day of freedom in probably the next 11 months. Sure I get off for the holidays but its not the same as summer breaks or vacation that doesn't revolve around a major holiday. As Baba keeps saying this Spring will probably be the hardest yet but for now I just got to worry about getting through another challenging anatomy class and from what I read at Rate My Professor, mine is tough! I will have to learn exactly how to study for this new teacher because with my old one and a favorite (he was so cute and sweet but tough) I knew how to zero in on possible areas. Ugh I am a little freaked out about this 8:30am class 2xs a week for the next 4 months! Anyone who knows me well knows I don't do mornings. What makes those mornings even worse is my class ends at around 11:40am and then I don't have class or teach that night till 6pm at the same campus. Most likely on those 830am days I will go back and forth to home and back to the school and either to study or to nap or to do lesson plans/grades.

So what exciting things do I have on my agenda the next few days here in the Big Apple? I am going to go to the DMV either tmw in between classes or on Thurs before meeting a friend whom I haven't seen in a few years for lunch at Grand Central station. Tmw night after I teach my 1st class its off to Blondie for dinner. She's making pot roast, yum yum I can't hardly wait for a home cooked meal! I am spoiled by Mom's these past few weeks. She even made me sirloin tips which I hadn't had in 20 plus years. As well as my all time favorite that's always a hit, the stove top BBQ chicken over rice. Meanwhile I also made Mom's recipe of a no bake key lime pie which is truly the simplest recipe yet.

1/2 cup of lime juice (preferably KEY lime)
1 can (14 oz) of sweeten condense milk
1 (8oz) of cream cheese
1 graham cracker or oreo crusted pie shell
1 (8oz) of cool whip

Step 1
Let the cream cheese sit on the counter for 1 hour to soften (trust me on this I didn't and it made it harder to blend)

Step 2
then mix the cream cheese, sweetened condensed & milk lime juice with an electric mixer till silky smooth (mine still had tiny bits of cream cheese which I hope won't be noticable?)

Step 3
Pour into the pie shell and let it sit in the fridge for a few hours.

Step 4
Let the cool whip (if still frozen) sit out for a while till soft

Step 5
Layer the whipped cream on top of the pie and stick back in the fridge for a few more hours.

The cool whip helps balance the tartness and thickness of the pie which is as I type this mouth watering DAMN GOOD! Also the pie does not require covering during this time, but once you serve it and have left overs, use foil or pie cover to keep it fresh. Tmw night I will bring this delicious treat to share with Blondie and Eddie! So Mom, thanks again for the great recipe! You see all of us, Baba, Mom and I are the kind of cooks that like recipes that are simple to make. I don't believe in tons of processed food but a healthy balance of some recipes using either few ingredients or some pre-made stuff is the only way I will be motivated to cook at home. I don't mind cooking if it doesn't take me forever to make and extensive cleanup. After all here in the city almost no one in an apartment has a dishwasher, this means EVERYTHING is hand washed. I am proud though since moving to this wonderful apartment, I do cook a lot more than I did at the old one. I admit my ex was right, it was too small to really live in comfortably. Here I actually have a KITCHEN. Not a little walk by area between my front door, the bathroom and the living room.

Last Friday night, I went to the Green Dragon with David, Nancy and Bobby. On the way there we saw a sign at one gas station that read this;

Here's me signing worms in ASL with Uncle David

Here's Nancy and David apparently excited about the possibilities &
don't ask me why David maintains a deadpan Amish if you will face-like expression?

I do miss my family, and I can't wait for some of them to visit. I am even determined that Baba comes for a 2 day visit at least. For once I am living in a nice place and I want her to see my home and see my life here. I am more than willing to drive her to and from PA to NYC and back. She will read this and think I am crazy but I am not and that's that. Its just a matter of when? Perhaps over x-mas? Either way we will order Chinese food and watch fun holiday movies like Christmas Story.

My aunt Nancy and I were also talking some about hers, David and Bobby's visit here and I figure if not this fall for sure this Spring. I want them to come on a weekend when I know Town & Village Synagogue will have ASL terps (thanks to Bram & Marcia and many others!) so they can come and meet my congregation as I consider T&V the place to be! Yes they should come in the spring, the Fall too many American and Jewish High Holidays to contend with. I would love for them to come in Feb when its bleak and cheer me up!

Mom's visit we talked about I think maybe around Thanksgiving? She come here and then we drive back together. Details will be arranged but Mom if that's not doable thats okay too, we can wait till xmas or later if necessary.

And don't forget too, my home is OPEN to all of my friends who ever want to come. Even if I am stuck with exams or whatnots, they will have the keys to come and go and we can always have lunch or dinners together. I owe a bunch of friends my couch to surf on as many have graciously opened their home to me these past 5 years.

Lastly I am THRILLED with my new internet service. No more portable crappy lose-the-signal internet!!! Nope, bye bye, all gone and never to return. I was able to view netflix streaming and hulu shows without choppy, waiting-forever-to load media!!! Whee, w00t, Yay!

Been bitten by the FB bug!

2011-09-02T14:32:00.003-04:00

Lately I am just KISS-FIST facebook! Fyi for those who are Deaf culture-impaired KISS-FIST is the sign where you kiss the back of your hand (your hand is a fist) and it means you really dig/enjoy/relish etc etc... Facebook is just a great way to keep in touch with everyone you know and since I am single again, I am rekindling friendships that were neglected and making new or stronger ones with existing ones.

I realize facebook isn't for everyone and at times it can actually be destructive when used to torment or harrass others but in general my experience with facebook has been mostly positive!

Back to saving mode!

2011-09-02T01:40:00.003-04:00

Lately I have been re-inspired to start couponing and getting free samples again thanks to Thrifty Deafies website, facebook group and youtube videos! Now I finally understand Wal-mart's coupon policy from this video whee!

Also the following stores offer free samples too (just google the name of the store + free samples)
Wal-mart
K-Mart
Target
Sam's club (sometimes)

Samples are great for when you travel or you run out of something, that little bottle of conditioner can be a lifesaver one morning before dashing off to work!

Where did the summer go???

2011-08-30T22:37:00.005-04:00

Argh I cannot believe summer is almost over! Nooooooooooooooooooooooo.................
Its true what they say, the older you get, the quicker time goes by. I mean sometimes I literally get confused what season it is?!

I am not looking forward to the yoke of work and going to school again but I sort of am at the same time. Weird I know but that's me :) In a little over a week from now I will have my 8:30 am class on Anatomy with a human cadaver. I suspect I won't be super hungry on those days. As much as I love my family and I do, my hometown is for those who have families, being single here at times is so boring. I am however grateful for the time with Baba and being with Mom, having meals with David, a beer with Rob and thrift shopping with Nancy. I am so lucky to have such a great family!

And I am happy to report the car repairs for my cute little passat will not be more than $250! Did Baba and I luck out or what?! I was dreading what the mechanic would say? Expecting it to be thousands of dollars but nope its just the flex pipe, whew! Thank you lady luck for cutting us a break, we have been nickle and dimed all summer long. Damn the state of NY for denying me unemployment as an adjunct professor. Not to worry I am appealing it and I know the chances of winning are slim but if we don't fight for changes nothing will improve! These colleges and universities are making a killing by hiring us as contract workers and I don't blame them because it makes sense business-wise. But for the state to deny us unemployment during periods where they don't offer work is crazy!

Pah, highway signs that are actually useful!

2011-08-26T00:31:00.002-04:00

This above all, to thine own self be true-Shakespeare

2011-08-24T01:43:00.003-04:00

Right now I am trying to decide whether or not I regret joining a well known dating site recently. Part of me feels like I should get back out there and date and part of me just doesn't want to be bothered. I guess I feel like its a competition between me and my ex and who finds love first again but that's just stupid. It doesn't matter who does and certainly not reason enough to start dating before I am ready. Don't get me wrong, I have been talking to lots of different guys all summer long and some of them have been quite a lot of fun to flirt with or get to know but nothing serious from any of them.

Part of the problem I think for me is my age, being 37 and single is not at all what I would've guess I would be if you had asked me that 10 years ago. I really thought (despite all of our problems and there were so many of them!) that my recent ex was the one I would marry or I did up till a few years ago.

Some days I wonder if I am better off never dating anyone again? Perhaps I am just some weirdo who can't get along with men? Perhaps I should just take Baba's advice and give myself a lot of breathing room. Lately though I find any of my relationships with the opposite sex (minus family and good friends) to be tiresome when I should in fact be excited. I guess I am just jaded and still working through my emotional baggage. I just don't feel like trying to wow anyone. I need to get back to the place I was before I met my ex where having a man in my life didn't matter (and still doesn't) but I was happy about it back then. Really I don't know what I want these days but I will be glad when I pass the 1 year mark because time does heal all wounds. Going back to work and school will help too.

I did find a quote back after my 1st breakup that I really liked and I probably already posted it before but what the heck I can post it again, cuz damnit its my blog!

The heart does heal, and you will love like this again-except that when you do, you'll deny ever loving like this before- Unknown

and some new ones I found tonight;

A break up is like a broken mirror. It is better to leave it broken than hurt yourself trying to fix it-Unkown

Life has changed not ended, move on and enjoy the rest of your life- former student of mine who I am fond of wrote this

There’s no need to miss someone from your past. There’s a reason they didn’t make it to your future.~ Unknown

It is far better to be alone, than to be in bad company.– George Washington

While I am not overly sad things ended, I just feel kind of like I am in a limbo between being fully healed and sad it didn't work out.

There's a blood feud brewing...

2011-08-06T21:01:00.002-04:00

Most of the time my family gets along but that may all change very soon. I am not looking forward to a possible WWIII so to speak. Life lately just seems a lot harder than need be. A certain someone is not minding their beeswaxs and by doing so, they are actually taking out their issue on a 3rd person instead of directly to me. I have had enough of this passive-agressive bullshit this person has been dishing out in my direction for years now. I wrote this person a rather long email covering all my bases and I really hope they will stop being so petty and GROW UP! If you have a problem with me, you need to an ADULT and speak to me about it. Its immature to complain to a 3rd person who is 85 years old and doesn't need the stress of your complaints! Yeah its obvious I am still pretty ticked!

Splitting atoms in your free time?

2011-08-04T00:45:00.005-04:00

Well this guy gives a whole new definition of a scientific hobby. Splitting atoms in his kitchen during his spare time, unbelievable! How dangerous can a person be?! It just blows my mind.

Tomorrow is my last exam for the summer. Its on the lab (primarily anatomy identification with some functions/concepts). I was unmotivated all day then finally around 730 I got on a roll and just finished a little while ago. I MUST wake up earlier enough to finish reviewing the reproductive system! Everyone kind of knows the external/genitals parts but its the internal mechanism that's harder with all its detailed components. My professor blushed when the word coitus came up and a few more times when he quickly rushed through reproduction system lecture. He told us we could read up on it at home knowing most of us have sat through sex education how many times? I am grateful the cardiovascular system was taught before the respiratory system. It made it easier to understand the respiratory system. The urinary system is somewhat interesting, its more about waste product removal and analysis of those substances and what possible conditions or diseases could be a result from those compositions.

I am happy to say that I am now conditioned to absorb these anatomical concepts a lot better these days. Something has changed in the way I grasp the material. I couldn't say what it is but its going to be very useful this fall when I am working as well as going to school. Last spring I wasn't used to or conditioned to this type of learning so it was extremely stressful at times. I feel more confident about my fall classes coming up, an advance anatomy class and a kinesiology class (the study of human and animal movement, performance, and function by applying ~~the~~ [various] sciences...) This should be a really interesting class! I relish learning this stuff.

I have also been working on my grad school application which is due the same day as my birthday. That should bring me some good luck. At first I really wasn't in the mood to write my admission essay (personal goal statement) but somehow it all came pouring out. Baba has been a great editor as usual. I plan to turn it all in tomorrow. That will feel good (because I finished it) but not so good (because now I will be worried, did I get in???)

An elemental movie I recommend

2011-07-31T23:24:00.003-04:00

The other day I saw the movie The Last Airbender, it was a good fantasy movie if you ask me. It was based on the 4 elements, AIR, WATER, FIRE & EARTH/ROCK and it had more than one character that the story revolved around. I highly recommend it if you're looking for an escape movie. It wasn't too heavy on the effects and not too skimpy on the story either. The main character Aang reminded me of the empress from the Never Ending, They don't seem to make good fantasy movies like they used to. Remember the Sinbad Voyage movies? They were great! Seems to me Hollywood has forgotten to tell a story sometimes when they get all caught up in the special effects.

Studying same old same! *sticks my tongue out*

Disney-turned-satanic mice

2011-07-30T22:44:00.003-04:00

Hurry UP! I cannot wait to be done with summer school. As much as I enjoy learning anatomy and I do, I just want freedom again. The fall will be here before we know it and then back to the grind of work and school. Lordy, I am not looking forward to that! But at least this time around I will have my Bastard Kitty Tom back and no relationship drama/upheavel to contend with.

How am I doing you wonder? Well I was really stressed out about my apartment. Between the ex's things still being here, the fact I never had the chance to finish unpacking and the takeover by a little band of black mice left me overwhelmed. But in the past week that has changed some. I am happy to report the ex finally came by last Monday and packed up about 1/2 his things. I was grateful that he did because the breakup happened right when I moved here and ever since I had been left with the mess. By starting in the living room. it allowed me the chance to sweep up the dirt/grime off the floor everywhere. And it gave me a starting point for a snowball effect and since then I have been working on the apartment little by little everyday. I am determined to have this place pretty much settled before Fall starts. Its a necessity I cannot afford to ignore. An unbalance home for me will have a negative effect on my outside life and how I feel on a day to day basis.

As for the mice situation, I am not embarrass to share this because I did not cause this. But what started off all cutesy and disney-like the 1st month I notice 1 mouse turned into a nightmare weeks later of being seiged by a set of Bronx mice.Those little sh*ts even eat plastic like the freezer door seal/lining, or the rubber bit on my cookware...unbelievable nerves of these mice! And I am tired of people offering me obvious advice such as "be sure to clean up after you eat" or "you just need to borrow someone's cat." Duh my Tom-tom will be back soon enough. "buy some traps." did that but those mice are too savvy and manage to get the food without setting off the traps. Until last weekend Saturday night I think is when the death of one mouse occurred. I came home late Sunday night to a stench ugh. My ex thinks the scent of their fellow mouse has scared off the others because the mice activity in my apartment has seem to lessen. For a while there they were downright brazen, just walking about as if I wasn't here and then suddenly they would stop when I'd see them and wonder? Can she see me? in their tiny little pea shitting brains.
Why yes, You little f*cker I can see you! And proceed to throw whatever handy object I have nearby. Imagine! This one little disney mouse who I felt shared some stupid commune with me for about 4 weeks (the month of June) brought a nightmare the month of July. Yep, this is why I cannot earn my badge as a New Yorker and remained forever branded as an out-of-towner. I am just too animal centric and those that look "cute" get away with a lot from me. I am so glad Tom is coming back. I really missed my cat. Yes he's another "little f*cker* but one I love!

Summer fever!

2011-07-23T19:45:00.004-04:00

I am in the throes of summer fever! I just want to be around people all the time! I have reverted to my happy Deafie go lucky self again. Its good to be back. For example I got to hang with a close friend last night who I really lost touch with. We stayed up till 5:15am just talking. It was great, since the friggin heat wave has left me mostly uncomfortable and unable to study. And forget trying to really cook, I have been living on fruit and water. Its the only thing along with protein I have been really eating. Water melon, nectarines, blue berries, strawberries, peaches, mango, bananas, black berries, raspberries and clementines, yum yum! So because its so damn hot out, I decided to drive home at 6am where there was no traffic. And I found a primo parking spot right in front of my building! Is that lucky or what? But starting Monday I gotta put my nose to the books and STUDY. I have 2 exams the following week. I can still play but not like I have these past few days. I feel like snoopy from charlie brown, where you see him jumping up with glee, that's me these days!

When the cat's away

2011-07-12T01:10:00.002-04:00

the mice will play. Sort of the theme for me lately. I have been much more social even if its mostly online and through emails. I tested out the VP on my phone and unfortunately I can see others but they can't see me too well. My phone keeps losing the 4G signal. I guess while I am in my hometown this weekend I will stop by the Sprint store and inquire further about that and my battery conservatory. Jesus these smart phones drawn a battery like mosquitoes do to humans! You don't realize it till its too late! But other than these 2 complaints I still LOVE my phone :]

I got some studying done today and a lot yesterday so I really feel like I am getting it, I still struggle with the cardiac output/blood pressure/volumes as well as the conducting system. But whats the hardest by far is the body's regulation of cardiac functions through neural, hormonal and uhhhh there's one more but its 1:15am so I am excused...anyways these 3 mechanisms have a interchange of plays and its hard to really completely get it. I got to say I have a new found respect for people in the medical field. I had no idea how high their standards are and I am more than happy by the challenge of it. Go anatomy!!!

Taking care of business

2011-07-09T23:43:00.002-04:00

I was happy that today was for the most part productive, even if I wasn't feeling my best. After running a few errands, I went to Jiffy Lube today. My car is in dire need of an engine fuel filter change but they explained to me at Jiffy Lube they cannot do Audis/VW because they require special tools. Damn German cars for being more expensive all around! But I still love my little car. I feel really bad for this inanimated object its crazy I know but I do. Been like that all my life. I remember being worried when I was really little that a particular stuff animal might be hurt if I didn't place it on by bed by my pillow. I guess I always care about how other people are feeling and even non-living things such as my car. And I guess I am grateful to have a car so its important to get it squared away soon!

So back to the point, Jiffy Lube people were so nice, they referred me to a car shop across the street that unfortunately was closed. Come Monday, I will see how much they charge for that type of work. I really need to get it done and go to my school to take care of financial aid related matters.

I also studied a good 4 hours for my exam today, I am glad its on the cardiovascular system. We have also begun to learn about the respiratory system as well (fascinating) how it all comes together. I really enjoyed learning about the epiglottis and glottis with the hyoid bone in the trachae. This is where people often choke when they try to eat and breathe at the same time. Basically what happens is you inhale bits of food and you end up coughing up a storm! That's the anatomy I recently learned about and we also got to use a spirometer which tests your I think is referred as respiratory volume but don't quote me on that. I know there is stroke volume to measure blood volume of one of the ventricles of the heart per beat. But my respiratory health looks great according to my age and I think it was height or weight I should have a 3000 (x-measurement) and I had 3500 yay! I also finally understand the whole diastole and systole concept. Diastole is when your heart is NOT contracting, in a resting state. While Systole is when your heart chambers contract (pump blood) into another chamber or artery. I still haven't fully mastered the difference during the ventricular diastole and the atria systole about how the ventricles are never fully empitied or something like that...it has to do with cardiac rhythm and blood pressure volumes...see I had to stop studying cuz now I am just confusing myself ;-)

I think the anatomy of the lungs is far more interesting to study than that of the heart. I guess because the heart is truly a pump based on a timing that the atria and the ventricles do not run pararell exactly. But then again ask me about the lungs in a few weeks from now. If there's some complicated chemical reaction involved in that related to action potential, I am not going to be a happy camper then either. I am just glad its not the endocrine system again. Man I got to say that was the most difficult of all to learn in all the areas we covered.

Onwards and upwards! Heave-ho! Heave-ho! Tally-ho!!!

Humpty-dumpty had a great fall

2011-07-08T16:31:00.002-04:00

All the king's horses and all the king's men
Couldn't put Humpty back together again

Right now am feeling very emo (I recently learned that it means emotional) today. My period started last night and my hormones are making me more sensitive than usual, which I really hate!

So its been about 3 months now since the break-up began, probably longer than that but "officially" 3 months now. I miss my ex in some ways, but in many ways I don't because of the constant fighting and stress. Both of us tried our hardest to make things work but like humpty-dumpty it was shattered beyond repair. Its like taking a bunch of rocks and smashing them into a window, and the window is left in shards. Those shards are what I am feeling today.

I am not one of those exes who blame my ex for everything went wrong, I too took part in all of this mess. But sometimes its just better to walk away. It hasn't been easy to study through all of this and because I spend a lot of time alone studying or saving money, I am feeling very despondent today. I know it will pass but its hard adjustment living alone again, peaceful yes but hard.

Going to Maine last week was the best thing to happen to me in a while. To be surrounded by many strong Deaf women at DWU conference was AWESOME! and to spend time with Ronnie and her family and friends, double the fun! I even made some new unforgettable friends too. But having arrived back only 3 days ago, it feels like it was so long ago now. I am just wallowing I suppose?

Tmw I will see my friend Ellie and today I am just going to cut myself some slack and get some rest, try to study for my exam and keep on moving!

A bloody mess

2011-06-12T15:26:00.007-04:00

The theme of my week has been quite bloody so to speak. Let's break it down to the WHYs?

1st off, I am ga ga over my new phone (Samsung Epic 4G Andriod Smartphone)- is that a mouth full or what? There are all these crazy and fun apps that I've been torturing my friends with, mainly the photo apps.

For example, I can zombify you using the Zombie Booth

An undead girl like myself wouldn't be complete unless she bit her best friend and zombified her as well!

I can turn you into the wolf when the moon is full by using Wolf My Face, yes its a bit hairy but doable...

If you're in the mood to just fool around I recommend PicSay

For media/commercial purposes, I would use photofunia as I did with my friend Jasmine

So back to this phone, it is AMAZing!!! There are so many bells and whistles, its like have a small computer in your backpocket. I never would've imagine 10 years ago we would have these smart phones! The other day I turned on my old SK3 phone to get some information off of the phone and saw how cumbersome it feels and looks and pales in comparison to my new baby Epic 4G!

I love all these different apps like one for my period tracker, another reason why this blog posting is called a bloody mess, cuz Aunt flo came and made herself at home and there was nothing I could do about it!

Also this week for A&PII lab we studied blood, blood types, blood cells etc etc. At one point, we would doing a lab exercise on identifying blood type and if it was positive or negative? It was a fake blood kit, don't I wish we could've identified our blood type for real. Anyhoo, I accidentally hit the little testing tray and promptly announced I was making a bloody mess which garnered a lot of laugh. So you see, blood doesn't have to be bloody bad but bloody fun!

Hit & Run, no fun!

2011-06-02T21:01:00.003-04:00

So yesterday morning as I was headed to work, I found this to greet me....my poor car! Luckily Jack was around to replace the tire with the spare. Still, its not cool this happened or that no one reported it.
it is also not cool that my class last night, the terps never showed up! It was not my usual terps which both are CODAs and real sweethearts. But the coordinator of disability services isn't exactly on top of things and I had to spend 3 hours trying to lip read and follow along. I really like my new teacher and think this class will be great. Just wish I could've catch more than 50% of what was going on. Ive already sent an email to find out why the terps never came. No reply. I better HEAR something by tmw via email. Or I am going to file a complaint.

Today was a lot better, still tired and also today was the last day of teaching till Sept! whee, now all I have to do is grade exams and figure out course grades on Sunday.

Next week I will JUST be a student, wheeeeeee!

FanFuckingTastic!

2011-05-27T00:36:00.003-04:00

I am blown away and ashamed to admit it but I PAH watch See What I am Saying. Man this was so well done and I am reeling from how good it was!

I have met and worked with CJ several times. He is a doll and a ball of energy. To me he is the Deaf version of Bill Cosby but he is CJ Jones, one of a kind in many ways. I enjoyed his earlier DVD What Are You Deaf? I watched it with Jack and laughed a lot, but Jack didn't. I guess you have to be Deaf to understand???

And I think many Deafies out there really envy TL. I remember back in MSSD I wrote and helped out with a Deaf band known as Night Hawks. We even peformed at Gally! I remember the drummer Dale was gung ho about drums. I seriously thought he would do that for a living. I wonder what ever happened to him? Many Deafies such as myself ENJOY siNGing and siGNing Songs! We can relate to hearing people the fun of singing, it feels GOOD. Granted we may not sound as good as hearies do but we don't care. TL you rock and as a former metal head (still am inside) I loved your drive!

Beethoven Nightmare is just like all the other hearing bands I've grown up around. My friend Adam (pronounce Ad-Damn!) still rehearses with his band every week. I got to hear them jam last summer. I asked how often do you perform? Its been over 2 years, Ad-Damn explained that he doesn't want to perform until they're ready! I liked that anyone like me who's ever been around a rock band can see Beethoven Nightmare is exactly alike except they're Deaf. I appreciated that aspect.

Lastly Roberto DeMayo while did not get good reviews from me for Deaf Idol a few years ago, is a terrific performer. He makes me want to adopt him. So much fun. I see why now when Blondie explained about the homeless part, I am glad he didn't have to suffer for too long and that he triumphed. As a big supporter of the LGBT community, my heart went out to him when he shared about his mother and her refusal to learn or use ASL. Very heart wrenching. I sincerely hope he has seen better days since the release of this awesome documentary!!!

If you are a bad Deafie like me and haven't seen this film. REDEEM yourselves now and DO IT. I commandth thee to shut up and rent it from netflix or watch it via on demand, you don't need the caption silly, its in ASL. The caption is for the signing impaired ;P

Happy Bappy

2011-05-23T00:30:00.002-04:00

My aunt Nancy says some really funny things at time. "Happy Bappy" is one of them. So after spending a day on my computer, 1/2 on a research paper that I am still not finished with. About 2/3rds done. The other half on lesson plans I have a little time to think about what makes me happy. It seemed like for a while there being buried with work and school I couldn't really do the things that make me happy. So I sort of forgot and decided, wait a minute, I gotta make a list. Cuz lists make me happy bappy!

-traveling; nationally or international or 1 block over, I love to travel and meet new people!
-camping
-film making
-photography if done creatively or with a purpose
-sharing experiences especially new ones
-meeting my friend's families or their friends
-playing pool, shooting darts, arcades
-any type of carnival or festival
-doing things you can only do in NYC
-being kind, volunteering or just being a good friend or family member
-spending time with my bastard kitty Tom and other pets that I like such as Eddie's cat Mia. Or feeding wild animals like birds or squirrels
-attending some live performances *plays, dance, music concerts, art work...*
-attending some sporting events be it local, college or professional level, I am all about team spirit and getting into the moment
-reading or learning new things on my own or in a class or with others
-collaboration in any form that helps me or the another person achieve common goals or each others' individual goals. I feel lucky I have many people here in this city to do that with!
-playing board games, cards, or doing jig saw puzzles
-learning new phrases or words in other languages be it spoken-(if I can?) but more likely can learn to write it or other sign languages. I still get a major kick out of the sign Knob picked up during her stay in Ireland and taught me how to sign FANCY such as I FANCY YOU. You use the LIKE sign only instead of on the middle of your chest, you do it on your throat. So cute! And while Uno Gestures is not a language but a communication system, I enjoyed learning and using that one as well.
-being an advocate in what I believe in and doing my part to the best of my abilities
-my friends and family make me very happy just because they are who they are. Life to me is like a book, each person adds character and enriches my world.
-seeing people around me who I care about succeed in their own challenges or goals
-chocolate
-parties
-seafood
-sleeping in
-saving money, its such a rush to see the bottom of my store receipts and see the total amount I saved. Bonus points for the receipts that tell me my total yearly savings! Yes yes yes!
-going back to school for a 2nd degree in OT, while the science classes are very hard, I am loving that I don't let that stand in my way at all. I earned that hard A- in my A&P I class which makes me VERY HAPPY!

And with this free time, I am reaching out to friends that I couldn't do before with the yoke I was wearing. Its such an ahh feeling right now. I sure hope the summer doesn't rush by me. I am only just beginning to relax. This memorial day weekend will be really awesome because I will spend it with my family who I haven't seen in about 2 months! Which as most of you know is too long of a time for me. I see peanut butter whoopee pies in my near future (and Baba don't you dare wear yourself preparing for my visit, I can get those whoopie pies on my own). I am coming to see YOU and Mom and the family :)

Trial and error

2011-05-19T20:02:00.002-04:00

Last of the work related stuff for the spring semester is DONE. Happy is the I.

I never knew how easy I had it being just a teacher before this semester. Being a teacher & a student is a whole other playing field and way more tiring than I could've imagined. Thank god for the car! Otherwise between the commute times and work and school I probably would've collapsed!

Now I am just a teacher again. You will not find me complaining about my work load any time soon. My new students are a good bunch. Makes time fly right by.

I have also learned that I do NOT like renting books but at the same time I prefer it over being stuck with a book at the end of the semester. But renting books is a little problematic right now because I still haven't really unpacked and I have 2 books due in a week. Must find them this weekend and mail them back. Honestly I guess I shouldn't mind but take my advice if you ever rent books, be sure to keep them all together in one place and their rental information nearby. I had to make a trip out north of the city to return 1 book that I didn't even use this semester. That's another thing I learned, better to see what the teacher wants you to buy. Don't follow whatever the book store says. They don't know. You will save yourself money and time. Disadvantage is you don't have the books as soon as you need them. I guess perhaps to email the teacher before class starts and find out what books they plan to use. Trial and error my friend, trial and error.

Lately the news...

2011-05-18T22:26:00.002-04:00

has been so depressing or outrageous that I wonder if I should continue reading it at all?

Seriously 1 man who won the Michigan lottery is still collecting food stamps. Come on, you're kidding me?! This is absurd, why has common sense gone out the window? I don't get it.

Another example of how rude our society has become is when a woman spends 16 hours on her cell phone and rather loudly on an Amtrak train. And here's the kicker, she was sitting in the designated and highly coveted "quiet zone" of the train. Good news is, she was escorted off the train via police officers. This makes me happy. Perhaps there is a little hope. But it is still pathetic we the public have to put up with this level of rudeness of a few others.

About a week ago I came across one story about an idiotic woman who parked where she shouldn't despite the many warning signs. I love the local official response to the woman's outrage, which was simply put "We have signs. Respect the signs." Yep exactly.

So maybe its not so much the news that I mind reading about. But its the large number of people who are blatantly inconsiderate of others and sadly apathetic to the world at large. Its like so many people out in the world forgot we all share human similarities despite any cultural differences. We are someone's child or partner or parent. We all have a fundamental desire to live and create lives for ourselves. We all have the ability to chose how we treat one another and I just can't grasp why people have become so mean and cold to one another. I see examples of this behavior every day and I still don't get it. Why not be nice and kind? Kindness doesn't cost you money and if anything its contagious because when you take a moment to acknowledge another human being in a non threatening way, you become more human. And they often do too, both people leave each other after sharing a pleasant moment or two. I just cant go through life looking at everyone I met or encounter as a possible threat or as someone I probably wouldn't like. I rather try to find some similarities about the other person and sometimes the exchange is so rewarding. Other times I am glad it ended. Anyhoo maybe its just my age catching up with me? It seems every older generations can never fully understand the younger ones. But this probably isn't the case here because I see this selfishness among all ages. Alrighty this is why its so depressing to think about.

On to other somewhat boring news, my life is starting to settle down some. I look forward to June when it really happens. I'll be done teaching and can take a breather for a few months. I'll just be a student in June, July and part of August. Seems like I will never escape school. I've been in school either as a student or teacher probably 3/4th of my life now. If I succeed and get my MS in OT, will I still work for the school system? I wonder...

Happy Mother's Day!

2011-05-08T17:39:00.004-04:00

Happy Mothers Day to my Mom, Baba, Nancy, Maria, Ronnie, Karen, Erica and many more!

An end in sight? Sort of...

2011-05-05T22:33:00.003-04:00

Tonight was my lab exam. It was tough. I spent 4 hours today and several hours yesterday prepping for it. I really struggled with the spinal cord & brain anatomy specifically in regards to the nervous system at a cellular level. The ventral root, dorsal root ganglion, archnoid mater, gray and white matter. So hard! I found the muscles both axial and appendicular based to be more pleasing to learn about and easier to remember visually. But damn the spelling! One muscle in your neck is called the sternoncleidomastoid, another one in your leg called seminmanbranosus and runs parellel to another one called semitendinosus. Don't even ask me why one leg muscle is spelled gastrocenmius. Many are two letter names like latissimus dorsi (dorsi means back, as in dorsal or posterior). Do I sound like a science geek or what? I joked to Blondie and Eddie that I feel like I am a walking encyclopedia of medical terms. Imagine what I will know by next x-mas? I will have completed 3 anatomy courses by then. Hope there's enough space in my cerebrum for it.

Tomorrow night I go to school to take a final exam for an online class I've been taking. It will be nice to be officially done with one class out of three in time for the weekend. The other 2 classes I will finish next week. My poor students were informed that while they took their exams earlier this week, not to bother me till next week Wednesday. I haven't even taken a peek at their exams. I can't at this point with my last lecture exam on Tuesday and a major paper/presentation due Saturday the 14th.

I just got to get through the next 9 days and then I can truly celebrate the end of the Spring semester!

2 Paws up

2011-05-03T18:04:00.001-04:00

For this bummer sticker I saw tonight
"Wag more
Bark less"
*wagging my tail*

My fortune cookie reads

2011-04-30T22:45:00.001-04:00

"You will become more and more wealthy."
Hmm I sure hope so :-D

A little "cellular out"

2011-04-21T02:16:00.000-04:00

I enjoy my A&P I class, the anatomy of the body is fascinating but as
I've come to learn. With each passing body systems we learn, my
professor or this area of science/medicine focuses on the cellular and
at times molecular levels of each body system. Ugh its a bit of a drag
sometimes. Honestly a contraction of a muscle with what happens with our
myofribils & the pivoting of the myosin head to expose the active sites
to I think its Ca2+ ions is a little boring. Also we are learning about
CNS (Central Nervous System) the spinal column and cerebral hemisphere's
gray and white matter, the ventral horns, afferent, efferent,
association neurons. It is awesome to be learning all this but its just
a lot of information to have to absorb at once.
Yeah I am a little stressed by work, school, life. Hurry up, 1 month
from now this will all be over, yay!

I'm nuts about Blue Diamonds!

2011-04-11T18:44:00.003-04:00

Lately in the food stores I've noticed a new line from Blue Diamond's Bold Flavor Almonds. Delicious! Granted its a salt-intake nightmare but damn tasty! I've tried 3 flavors so far
-Salt & Vinegear
-Carolina BBQ
-Lime-Chilli
I gotta say Lime-Chilli was the best followed by Salt & Vinegar. The BBQ one was good too but not as addictive at the other two!
So I should be studying, and I should be grading or doing a lesson plan but frankly I am tired. Didn't get enough sleep last night. Funny it was the 1st night of difficulty falling asleep since moving the new apartment. I am in LOVE with my car and new apartment. Seriously I feel extremely lucky and grateful for all of my good fortunes for the people in my life who make it possible.
The weather today was beautiful. Drove with the sun roof down and my driver side window down on my way home from NJ. So nice. I enjoy familarizing myself with different highways and driving routes. I am beginning to grasps the driving landscape of NYC, its flow and ebb. When traffics bad where? I learned a big lesson on Saturday, do NOT park downtown. Its insane, 50 cents for every 10 minutes! Crazy!

Damn its too late to nap and I am overwhelmed by the apartment right now with all the unpacking left to do. But I am not gonna dwell on that right now, instead going to chill and watch an episode of Lost from season 4. Which by the way I feel is when the show has taken a serious nosedive, I hope season 5 & 6 are better??

Park Ave Roses

2011-04-09T18:09:00.000-04:00

Pah after reading in the NY Times last Jan
about the flower sculptures by artist
Will Ryman being displayed on Park
Ave, I got to see them today. I was only
able so snap photos of 2 of the
sculptures because I was driving downtown
admist the many NYC taxi drivers. So
pretty! Its things that these that put a
smile on your face. The exhibit
which ends May 31st, starts at
59th street and ranges for 10 blocks.
Be sure to check it out if ure in the city!

Someone got the Easter Spirit!

2011-04-07T22:13:00.000-04:00

So cute! I had to snap some photos before my A&P lab.

How reasonable am I?

2011-04-04T18:34:00.000-04:00

Could my new urban view be any
better than this? I LOVE my new
apartment! I can MOVE around and not run
into things like walls. Amazing, Jack & I can
now enter the bed on our respective sides.
Such a difference. I used to not like a lot
of space but now I feel the opposite. The
ability to move around in a home was
more important than I realized. Live and
learn eh?

The move at 1st did not go well. I did get
into an argument with one of the movers
about the fee of the move. I just wouldn't
accept his outrageous prices after being
told via email the original price.
At one point he asked to speak to my
"husband" [Jack] who had already left
to transfer all of our vital electronics
to the new apartment. I told the man he
has to work with me. He said I wasn't
being reasonable and I replied, "how
can I be to your unreasonable actions,
backing out of the original agreement."
He kept pointing to the email which were
in chronological order and trying to make
it seemed his new rate quote was based
on a 2nd email but it wasn't true, it was
on the 1st email and so what if I forgot
2 items in the 2nd email. In the 2nd
email I also added that I knew I was
forgetting things but the rate quote
was given after the 1st email. I
am so stubborn I threatened to
cancel the move. I gave him a price
I was willing to pay for x amount of
service. I felt like all he could see on
my forehead was the word Sucker!
10 minutes later he agreed.

It was more than the original rate quote
but it was fair because I had more things
for them to move that wasn't in the 1st
email. Plus they had to hike a queen size
up 5 flight of stairs because the elevator
wasn't big enough. The move after we
agreed on the moving price went very well.
I offered them both bottled water in the
middle of the move. The movers seemed
surprised after me standing my grounds
earlier. I think they thought I was very
angry but I wasn't. I was firm about how
"reasonable" id be. They appreciated it
and I thanked them for a good job.

The move

2011-04-02T01:39:00.001-04:00

Ugh I hate the stress of moving. Yes I
am excited to move to my new home but
the packing and prep is a pain! And I am
still waiting on the movers to confirm for
Sunday or Monday. Plus in the morning
less than 8 hours I will start my Saturday
morning 9am class. So you can imagine
I am all happy dory, not. Rather I am tired,
that's all. Not upset but tired and stressed
that there's not enough time to do grades,
study, my laundry, finishing packing and
MOVE over the weekend. And Jack's idea
of packing is shoving things into plastic
bags so I sent him out for the evening
so I could get into a packing zone which
I did. Not finish. And where did all these
things come from?!? I am glad I will
have 3 closets to work with at the new apt.
Got to get to sleep soon but I rather be
watching episodes of Lost. That show is
addictive. How the heck the show writers
kept coming up with new twists and
surprises ill never know? And I am only
near the end of season 2. Now I understand
why Blondie salivated every weekend
before Sunday night when the show aired.
Thank you Blondie for making me give
Lost a 2nd chance! Go Hurly, Sawyer,
Locke, Charlie and Mr. Ecko!

The "Blown Away Guy"

2011-03-22T23:49:00.003-04:00

Early tonight after spending the day packing up the apartment, Jack and I went out to a store and came home with this kick-ass rug. It will make our new living room pop! I tried to explain to Jack at one point that I think our view of the city is like that poster from the 80s by Hitachi Maxwell known as the "Blown Away Guy." Do you remember it?

To me this is one of the few images that defines the word Cool. And our new place is urber wickedly cool!

In case you missed

2011-03-21T11:25:00.000-04:00

Having snow, here's some more! Made possible by your local old man
winter!

Dunno who the artist is

2011-03-17T02:51:00.000-04:00

But I've always liked this art piece

"Off with her head!" The Queen of Hearts

2011-03-17T02:46:00.001-04:00

Here in NYC, there's a small chain of
Alice's Tea Cup cafes, very darling to
go to. Best to go during the week days
because on the weekends, these places
places are packed with an hour or more
wait.

Blondie and I went and had a lovely time.
As "we're all mad here."- Cheshire Cat

Baba's Havarah

2011-03-17T02:30:00.000-04:00

Last summer or fall, I helped Baba
put out a terrific display of tasty
bites and the spread was too pretty
not to take some photos!

Antique Cafe

2011-03-17T02:23:00.000-04:00

In NYC sucks. While the decor
and cute cat outside the place,
the food was bad, the waitstaff
worse and basically it seemed
like a place people go to, to
look artsy but snobby at the
same time. If you're ever
downtown in NYC, and don't
feel like being ripped off,
do yourself a favor and skip
this dud.

Damn you Danger!

2011-03-17T02:03:00.000-04:00

So Tmobile mails everyone who owns a
sidekick phone that the data carrier
company called Danger will no longer
be servicing Tmobile after May 31st!
This means I must part with my beloved
tmail account and phone number I've had
for at least 8 or more years. Ugh I
don't want to. And to add salt to
the wound the same letter announces
cheerfully that I could keep using my
sidekick for phone calls etc etc..
Useless to me. I need the data ONLY
plan which despites the ups and downs
of this company, Danger provided this
service.

This is so what I don't want
to think about. Buying a new phone,
aka my life cord. I tried to research
phones on the internet but this isn't
effective way for me to judge. One of
these days I will go to several major
cell phone carrier shops and have
someone show/demonstrate their
phones for me. I want one that's
affordable, that I can access the web,
email, text msg, take photos and
play games on. MAYbe a voice plan
since I can use the tcoil switch with
an nozifree ear piece and call my
Mom or Grandmother once in a while.
I don't know, because then people
start calling you and I can't handle
that....

I was tempted for a while to get an IPhone
after Blondie got hers last spring
with all the bells and whistles. I think the
apps are so cool! Like the GPS app or the
identify the song playing app and Blondie
has all these fun games to play. But
several things are holding me back.

1- I drop phones. And I've seen many students
with cracked IPhone screens knowing
I would be one of them if I owned an
IPhone.

2- you can't get the "data" only plan,
its automatic come with voice plans
which means more blood is shed, er
I mean more money parts my pockets!

3- I catch an occasional news about
whatever crisis IPhone is facing at the
time and I don't want to deal with it.
Danger had several major crisis that
made my phone unusable for as long
as 2-3 weeks....

4- IPhones are not cheap

I don't want Jack to help me pick out a
phone. He means well but he's a strict
PC user, where as I enjoy the best of
both world, PC & IMac etc etc. I find his
phone choices (and this man loves his
phone and goes through them like
klennex) I've seen many phones over
the years and still preferred my sidekick
the whole time. Nope this is one
technology-based decision I am going
to do solo.

Meanwhile I gotta start transferring
information off my phone and was
browsing through my photos. Some of
them I realized I hadn't posted yet.

These photos were taken on the way
to work 1 day. There's a small, short
woody trail between the metro-north
railroad stop and the campus I
work at. Au nautrelle and I've seen on
occasions, deers standing around,
no futher than 15 ft away from me.
Such a lovely sight to see.
Unfortunately my sidekick camera
makes objects seem further away
than they appear. Still sweet nonetheless

I love my students

2011-03-16T00:32:00.001-04:00

Every year there's a few students who always
stand out more than others. They can be so
sweet! Like my 1 student text me a photo of
her friend wearing a Gally t-shirt. Another 1
text me last week they at event where they
met some Deafies. A 3rd one was kind enough
to email me a link to an online ASL dictionary.
I am so lucky that for the past 7 years of
teaching I've met some really cool people.

In other good news, I did better than expected
on my exam #2 from last week. Got an 88%
and if I had left some of my original answer
instead of changing them, I probably would've
gotten a 95%! W00t! Now I only have to wait
for Thurs to come to find out how I did on my
1st Lab Practical Test?

Apt hunting still in effect. Tmw we drop off
some paperwork for one that we may get into.
I like the location in terms of work commutes.
And it seems like these apts have closets.
So my only hope is they will excuse the fact
I am a few Ks short of their income
requirements. Its like I am short by 2Ks,
that's all! I just gotta hope. Won't know
till Friday or next Monday. I am going to
put it out of my mind and continue to look
at more apartments later this week.

Not a great day

2011-03-11T23:46:00.001-05:00

Still sick, antibiotics didn't work, saw the
doc tonight, got new ones so should be
better soon...

Apt that we both really interested, we went
and found out its booked till at least May.
This has left us both discouraged.
Thus we ended up bickering on & off all
day. Neither of us handles stress well
together.
Not fun a fun day.

One small silver lining, actually 2.
1- the test last night for the A&P Lab
wasn't as frightening as I expected.
I still struggled primarily with tissues
& bone surface markings. I feel
confident I should not walk away with
anything less than a C or B- if im
lucky?
2-Jack and I went to bed not anger
but with some TLC that we both
should've been handing out earlier
today. In my defense *coughs coughs*
I am sick. And everyone is a baby when
they're sick. I admit I am a little more
cranky than usual.

Glad today is almost over with tomorrow being right around the corner.

After.Life

2011-03-10T14:00:00.003-05:00

Last night through netflix watch instantly, I watched After.Life with subtitles starring Liam Neeson, Justin Long (who strangely resembles Pete Wentz) and Christina Ricci. It was a strange but captivating movie about a funeral director who has the special ability to communicate with those in between life & death, the limbo stage. Christina's character died in a car accident and struggled to accept that she would be buried in 3 days. The movie toys with the idea that perhaps the funeral director was really a serial killer? And did not get good reviews but I liked it.

So in 15 minutes I take my lab practical test, yippeee. I am not looking forward to it. I just couldn't master the bone's surface markings or tissue identification. I have to try my best and see what happens....

Tomorrow Jack & I are going to look at one apartment we both feel is promising and in our price range. Keeping my fingers crossed!

Palmers Hollow Chocolate Bunnies

2011-03-07T20:36:00.003-05:00

So earlier today I was in Walmart aka Satan's den as some people call it picking up a few grocerie items when I saw the Easter candy display. My oh my, I was literally drooling, I think Easter out of Valentines Day, Christmas and Halloween is the best variety of mouth watering chocolates. I couldn't leave without buying 2 Palmer "totally delicious"-as touted on the box Hollow Milk chocolates! One for me, one for Jack. Yum, yum! The taste brings back memories. See as a Jew we celebrate Easter as the holy grail of chocolates in a basket. Nothing more religious to us than Halloween. Funny, I just learned when googling for a photo of the bunny, they have different names! Mine bunny's name is Honey, Jack's bunny's name is Yummy (white chocolate).

So ay yi yi tomorrow is the 2nd exam. I feel I will do ok but Thurs lab test, I am not confident at all. And frankly I've decided not to stress over it because we have to chose our battles wisely. Either I do poorly on both or I do well on one and bad on another, maybe it won't be as bad as I think but I just couldn't handle studying for both. The stress of finding an apartment I think is another reason why I struggled to study. Its hard to relax when I don't know where I will be living at in a month from now?

Anyways, I am going to use chocolate therapy tonight, as I do every night :-) And let the eggs crack where they may.

I heart modern medicine

2011-03-05T14:54:00.001-05:00

Once again I ended up w/another UTI/kidney mess! Ugh I just don't get
any symptoms except for cramping and so many things can cause cramps.
Nope not till a few days ago when my energy was zapped, my focus in a
haze and pains by my side did I realize I was down for the count. Man if
it wasn't for modern medicine I wouldn't be alive today. A few hundred
years ago I probably would've died as a baby or toddler. I've always
been a sickly person who when stressed my immune system goes cuckoo
cuckoo! But I can't complain, I rather be sickly than so ill I couldn't
participate in everyday life.

Tonight I am going to Grand Central to meet Blondie and her old friend
MJ! I cannot wait to see MJ, I've not seen her for 10 years! She was one
of the sweetest girls I've ever met and super peppy! Always so up and
about. It will be fun to catch up and hear about her life since. She has
had a hard one no doubt.

Next week I have the exam #2 & the lab test #1, I am doing my best to
prepare for them. I studied about 5 hrs yesterday till my brain went on
strike. So instead I play computer games and watched tv

Not much else exciting happening except apt hunting, Jack thinks we may
have a real possibility in Rockland county! W00t! We will look this
Friday!

I'm ready for the Lion

2011-02-28T16:55:00.005-05:00

I think everyone, including myself here in the NE, is ready for March. We just have to get through the next few weeks of the Lion to arrive to the Lamb. The old idiom is true March comes in like a lion and goes out like a lamb. Funny in December I was LOVing the cold weather and the snow that accompanied it but I don't like it now when its just cold with zero snow. I have enjoyed this past winter mostly because of the amount of snow, just makes Old Man Winter all the more bearable. I am so glad I live on the east coast, I think I would go crazy without 4 seasons.

I am also stressed about the fact that in 4 weeks I must have already found a new home. This Friday we will begin the apartment hunt. Jack has several places lined up for us to see. I really want to take the time to see as many places as possible. I just don't want my next apartment choice to be rushed. Ideally I seek a place with a lot of closets, a dishwasher, available parking and reasonably nearby commerce for shopping, etc., etc.. If I am giving up the city, I expect space at my new place. I have adjusted to being a driver again. It has been such a blessing and has made my life so much easier in terms of work and school. I still use the subways and bus but my everyday life occurs outside of the city now so its good that I have a such a great reliable car. The EZ pass, what a drag. That is one adjustment I am having difficulty with, there are a million tolls here. And they charge you $8 every time you enter the city. What a gyp! Its a crime how much toll fees there are in NY & NJ! Back in the DC area, there was none of that nonsense and the roads were better kept too.

So this week has been studying the axial skeleton bones and surface markings. The coloring pages and labeling really works for me. Plus there's a few science websites that are out there to use for practice quizzes and identification activities. The key for me is to pick an area and study it. For example the pelvic girdle, I've only mastered the bone names but not the surfacing marking. The hardest axial bones I have trouble with are the arms and legs, remembering specifically the forearm bones and the lower leg (calf area) bones. They are troublesome for me, and we must also be able to identify which angle the bone is being viewed from and if its the left or right side? But I am getting there. I did lousy on the 3rd quiz related to tissues but apparently so did everyone else. That's probably still a weak are for me. Tomorrow I meet with a "study specialist" for advice and suggestions. I hope she can help me with my note taking for the physiology part of the course. I find myself literally coping word for word from the textbook when I am taking notes. How do I narrow in on what I should be writing down? Its not like I know some areas and can skip them. I know nothing about A&P so it feels like everything is important when I am reading the textbook.

Currently when I take breaks from studying or working, I reward myself with episodes of Ugly Betty. I can see why the show was a big hit. If you have netflix and are Deaf, all of Ugly Betty seasons are available live streaming with subtitles :)

Ted Bundy

2011-02-25T00:52:00.004-05:00

Tonight Jack & I watched a movie called and about Ted Bundy which was fascinating! I remember my family talking about Ted Bundy when I was a little kid in the kitchen at the old house. I knew he was a big deal but I never really knew why. The term serial killer was first used to describe Ted Bundy. And how he lured his victims, wow. Sick man. The movie never explains why he's acts this way, it starts off when he's an adult. Poor Jack being hearing and all, he could hear the thuds, whack, pounding where I watched them being closed captioned. He shudder a lot in this movie so if a guy like that can get my man to have the heebie jeebies, you know Ted Bundy is ALL bad news. He was electrocuted at age 42. At the end of the movie they claimed he had over 200 women write to him in prison who all said they loved him. Like he's was a rock star or something and here's his groupies, VErY weirD! And a little mind boggling that there are women out there that find the quality of brutalizing serial killings of other women as attractive and desirable trait in a man. According to wiki and the movie I watched tonight, both mentioned his love for skiing. That's what I remember now, I remember thinking he died in some skiing related accident. Even now I can pull a clear cut memory of looking at a newspaper photo of him where he was skiing. I also remember my family were talking about the fact he died in my early teens. All these years I just never really knew is importance. It's good to find out why. He had the typical "f*cked up" childhood and was unable to master social norms needed for successful mainstreaming. Oddly he was even more cruel to the few younger victims, 2 girls age 17, one was even 12. The frequency of his murders was unbelievable and couldn't happen that way today. If you look at his photo, you'd never think a nice looking face was that horrific. Goes to show, we never really know who someone is behind closed doors where no one is watching them.

My study wall

2011-02-22T22:52:00.000-05:00

I started a "study wall" last week to help
me with visual identification of tissues.
You know the adage "out of sight, out of
mind." So the study wall helps me to
combat on that. This week I've been
focusing my attention on 2 of the 3
main areas of the axial skeleton.
Cranium
&
Thoracic Cage
Because that's what will be on the quiz
Thursday. And some of my attention is
learning about the different types
of vertebrates find in the spinal column
(the 3rd area of the axial skeleton).

I am constantly wanting to focus my
attention to my A&P studies. I feel
guilty if I don't do at least some
studying every day. Who knew I get
hooked?

Baba = Zen

2011-02-18T02:10:00.005-05:00

Tonight after my A&P class, Jack drove us to PA for a weekend visit :-) Happy is the I. As soon as we arrived to my hometown, I immediately felt calmer, more relaxed. Baba's home is truly a lovely place to be. So nice, spacious, tidy and clean! I am so relieved to be here.

Yesterday I received some tragic news about a dear friend of mine who I believe at 8 months pregnant, lost her baby. I was crushed to learn about this terrible news. This woman is one of the sweetest people I know. She is kind, and would give you the shirt off her back if you needed it. It sucks when lousy things happen to good people. No one is immune to tragedies but this feels extremely unfair. The worst part of it all is there's nothing anyone can really do. No one can erase the parent's pain or devastation they must be feeling. No one can bring back their baby boy. It broke my heart when she wrote "he had his mommy button nose and wavy black hair and his Daddy's big feet and hands. He was perfect." Even as I re-read it, it brings tears to my eyes. I think this will haunt me just like my nephew's best friend suicide from 2 years ago, I still think about Nigel and how if he had just waited a few more years things would've improved for him. I know, I've been there. Anyone from a small town who has been bullied and tormented for years never thinks there's an end in sight but there is.

In other news, I think I did pretty okay with tonight's quiz on the body tissues. What I did to help me identify the various tissue types was to include what they looked like to me. For example I found the simple cuboidal epithelium to look like tomatoes when they are cut in halves. For Areolar CT (Connective Tissue) I felt it look like a modern painting from the 60s & 70s. For Transitional tissue (such as your urinary bladder that allows for expansion and recoils after stretching) I thought it looked like pomegranate sliced in halves.

And I also identified the Hayline Cartilage as either foot prints or 2 peas in a pod.

Perhaps you can see why I came up with these marking labels but maybe they are like clouds in the sky where it looks like one thing to one person and another to a different person? Anyways I had to find a way to identify them. I found that by doing so I was then able to memorize at least 1 function and 1 location per 13 tissue we had to learn (there are more Tissue types than that but for tonight's quiz that's how many we had to study). Tissues are divided into 4 categories. Epithelium, Connective, Muscle and Neural. In order to prepare for the quiz, I posted pictures of the tissues on my bedroom wall and spent a lot of time just re-writing the tissue names, functions and locations. I hope it pays off.

I was glad to see that the quiz I took last week on identifying the cell structures, organelles and Mitosis, I did much better than I thought I had. Plus it helps that the professor always gives us a few extra credit questions which turned my A- to an A+. Funny as an adjunct professor myself I don't believe in extra credit (at least not in regards to ASL because honestly if you show up and practice outside of class, you'll pass with flying colors). But for this class with all the material we cover every week, I appreciate the little extra credit on the quizzes.

After the quiz we dove into osseous tissue (bones). This week I must study the axial skeleton regions (Cranium, Thoracic & Vertebrate Column). Not only must I be able to identify the bones in these areas but the surface features as well as cranial sutures (interlocked/joined bones which makes up the skull). And I must memorize all the facial bones as well. My medical vernacular is growing in leaps and bounds! The professor was kind enough to bring additional resources to our lab tonight, including a workbook that involves coloring pages and different worksheets which I was able to xerox as I need all the help I can get.

NYC Lunar Potholes

2011-02-11T02:36:00.002-05:00

Speak of the devil! Lunar Potholes

The photos say it all, especially the 1st one.

Valence Shell

2011-02-11T01:25:00.003-05:00

Tonight I wish to feel like a Valence Shell (the outermost part of an atom's shell) And had a complete number of electrons orbiting my nucleus. This would make the atom (ME) stable :}
I am happy to report I got an A- on my 1st exam and an 87 on my 1st quiz. But tonight's quiz, eh, not so good. The functions of certain organelles and cell parts were a little tricky for me tonight on that quiz. And I do not test well if I am tired. I will probably have to give up teaching 1 class in NJ next Spring. See I have a very limited time frame in which I am eligible for FA so that toppled on with my job teaching times versus the available class times that I need to take. I really hope my 1 boss works with me on my schedule to allow me to take the needed course load. Yep, I am stressed. But once I get this squared away, I will be able to relax.

I also have been taking an online class which did not off to a promising start. Anyways I have my 1st assignment given out earlier this week due before later today (Friday night) at 11:59pm! And I am just not into the whole "online" discussions. Ugh I got to print out the discussions and read them as a thread, otherwise I am not going to do well at them. I tried using that method (online discussions) for 1 semester teaching ASL in terms of the cultural readings, not ASL lessons. I did not enjoy it and certainly being responsible for it did not help. But I am hoping after tomorrow this online class becomes smoother sailing?

So during the periods when I am not studying or working I have been day dreaming of a major road trip. Something along the east coast (don't worry Baba, it wouldn't be any time soon) I just missed a lot of old friends from MSSD and Gally. I want to rub elbows with people I grew up with in some ways. Esp 2 friends one from SC and the other from southern Virginia. I think SC would be as far South I want to go in order to see dear ones. I am so happy and grateful to Baba that I have a used car to get around. I have adjusted quickly, Jack will vouch for that. He has been wonderful on the maintenance of both his baby and my car. He will soon replace one of the headlights that went out in the morning. Already replaced the windshield wipers. I am pleased. The ONLY complaint I have to say is I hate the GW Bridge (95) here. Its really bad off the Bronx area and unfortunately when going north I get caught up in the painful inching of cars for almost an hour to move I think its 1 or at most 2 miles. Its HORRIBLE. But I will grant you this much, its not as bad as 495 back in MD/DC/VA, the part going into VA, bad! That one was pretty bad but at least its a straight shot. And the roads, omigod, pot holes that would literally rip out the guts of your engines. I am NOT kidding. I think that's part of the reason why there are not too many accidents here. Everyone is keeping an eye out for the one that if you felt it, would make your stomach drop. I cringe at the few times I felt my new pride and joy hit one of the smaller ones. Thank god none were killer size. But they're out there, kind of like Black holes and dark matter.

And for this weekend, Saturday has been designated as my "fun day" of the week. The plans are as follow; Attend Jewish services in the late morning. Visit my friend Martin and eat Indian food
and maybe visit with Blondie to wrap up the day? Awaiting her reply.

Newest material I must digest and regurgitate is the Body' Tissues from cellular level and on up. Plus and here's the part I struggle with, is identifying it at a microscopic level. Tonight through the microscopes I looked at samples such as bladder tissue, lung tissue and many others. We had to draw diagrams of what we saw. Mine looked like a 7 year old drew it and I even tried to buy some pencils at the bookstore during the break but they were closed. The professor agreed to allow us to take it home and finish it, even though it was an "in class" assignment. Me personally I needed time to digest it. The one thing he preaches to us and I to my students is to read ahead. But he doesn't realize I don't have the time to learn 2 major biological concepts and all the details that accompany them and then try to read up on upcoming materials when he's quizzing us weekly or giving a Test or Exam every few weeks. Anyways I am going to try somehow to read up before the next class so I can do better. One little thing I find helpful when I study, is I imagine my brains building new memories and connecting pathways. Plus repetition helps, I often re-write concepts/systems over and over again till they make sense. To me its like when I learned Psychology and ASL/Linguistics, there's always a set of terminology you must master in which you will then understand the concepts. Biology seems to be going the same way but instead of having a year to spare and take my time, I got to bring it up to a whole new level and do it NOW.

Lastly I noticed today that people need to take a chill pill. This one lady at the library got all bent out of shape when at the printer in which all students share got mad at me when I accidentally creased her 1 paper out of like 50. She barked at me "look at what you did!" I replied "It was an accident. (cuz I was surprised) And after all its only paper, it can be reprinted." she then upped it and said "see, it doesn't have page numbers!" I was like "relax!" And at one point I even told her to "grow up." Yet, she just kept at it with the guy seated in between our computer seats. I spent the rest of the time ignoring her and tried to study for my quiz that I took earlier tonight.

My lease ends in a matter of weeks, very strange. I've done some packing but honestly I am not going to go gung ho till I have a place to move to and the means to do it. Right now I don't and won't till early March. And that's the way things go, I can't be worried about it when I can't do anything. Might as well study instead.

Hey

2011-02-09T13:03:00.002-05:00

Dear "whatever4269"
Make your blog public again. I need my
daily droll blog fix.
And I hope you got some snow in TX you've been wanting. Snow is awesome.
:}

DCMP.ORG Rules!

2011-02-06T17:06:00.006-05:00

Some Deafies may not be aware of this terrific organization called Described and Captioned Me di a Program. Its a free government sponsored organization that provides media materials to the Deaf and Blind. I've been a member for years now and recently its been a real life saver. Why? Because the media on this site are all educational related (so if you're looking for the newest blockbuster movie, this isn't the site to go to). But if you're looking for videos on cell life and basic molecular atoms. Or you want to learn some history like who really was Alexander Graham Bell? This is the site for you. You must either be DEAF or BLIND, a student or an educator to join. Lucky for me I am both. They provide different media formats, CD-ROMS, DVD, WEB & STREAMING. So for the past 24 hours I have been able to watch stream content on cells and chemistry and it helps a lot.

On Friday I got to see Blondie and Eddie, it was my "fun" quota of the week. Since I've turned into basically a science nerd with no life, I have to actually make sure I have fun at least 1x a week. Even if its only for a few hours. It was good to see them and vent about my worries on chemistry and being able to understand organic compounds and so on. Its getting easier each day I try and study. I still have left to cover pH, bases and acids as well as a few more areas. My first A&PI exam is on Tuesday and I want to do well. The professor wasn't kidding that you should spend an average of 10-12 hours a week studying and believe me I do and more. I usually study for blocks of 2-5 hours at a time. Some days due to work and life I just don't have the time, so studying in large blocks works better for me. I found some quotes to help keep me motivated

Research is what I'm doing when I don't know what I'm doing. ~Wernher Von Braun

The greatest discoveries of science have always been those that forced us to rethink our beliefs about the universe and our place in it. ~Robert L. Park, in The New York Times, 7 December 1999

The whole of science is nothing more than a refinement of everyday thinking. ~Albert Einstein

If it's green or wriggles, it's biology.
If it stinks, it's chemistry.
If it doesn't work, it's physics.
~Handy Guide to Science

The universe is full of magical things patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper. ~Eden Phillpotts, A Shadow Passes

One fascinating thing I have discovered since starting this A&P I course is how all the things I have studied in the past are being verified, explained or reinforced by what I am learning now. I never imagine that I would appreciate chemistry and atoms the way I am now. Its just absolutely captivating all the little ah-ha moments I have had over the past few weeks. The fact is, the structure of atoms is one of the universal patterns found in all region of life/matter. See there are repeating shapes found in several categories such as Sacred Geometry or Metapatterns or even Universal/Geometric Natural patterns. These patterns include shapes/concepts like the Golden Mean (branching, human lungs, plants), Fractals (snowflakes, ocean waves), Spheres (balls, atoms), Meander (rivers, streams), Radial Ripple (explosions, fireworks, flowers), Alternation (infinity/8-shape), Close-packing (Clusters-where the shape packs repeating items as close together as possible such as a honeycomb) and Spiral/Helix (DNA, seashells). Out of all of these patterns, one of them is guaranteed to be found in anything and everything. All my life I have always been drawn to universal patterns both on a micro and macro scale. This to me is the closest thing we can learn about and study to understand God or the life force. And I am finding that my science studies are helping to broaden these concepts.

This past Friday was also Baba's 85th bday and I was disappointed I couldn't be there to celebrate. Baba assured me it was a nice birthday sans moi. Oh well, you know what they say, you snooze, you lose so I had to sacrifice something in order to have time to do all the studying, grading students' papers and videos and still be able to do some laundry. I also feel kind of dumpy lately because while I am super busy, I am not moving much because studying is sort of a sedetary activity. Perhaps when the weather gets warmer I may actually do the cliche thing and study at a park somewhere. Nah, I know myself too well. I find I study best in my bed with the tv playing or in the living with the tv on. I don't watch it, it just needs to be on.

I did watch 2 different movies over the weekend during my downtime from studying. One was called Cats Don't Dance which was ok, it had a lot nostalgic moments borrowed from the golden age of Hollywood but overall it was satisfactory to watch. I needed to watch things that don't require heavy thinking or mental investments so I picked a different kids movie called G-Force which was a lot better. I got a kick out of this movie made in 2009 about a group of Guinea pigs who are trained as special agents. It was deftly done! Really enjoyed it and think any one of any age would get a kick out of some of the scenes or things that were said. If you need a fun, light movie to watch I highly recommend G Force (which by the way is subtitled by Netflix and available for streaming).

So another week coming up and not much exciting is happening in my near future but that's life. I am gonna keep my head buried in the books and occasionally peek out for some merriment.

Fried bananas!

2011-01-27T22:58:00.000-05:00

So I brought some bananas the other day
but of course haven't finished eating them.
I am picky about eating banana, I only eat
them when they've just ripened. You know
when they turn from green to yellow?
Without any brown spots, yum yum. But
once they're really ripe I either make
banana bread or throw them out. Last
night however I googled "what to do
with ripe bananas?" and found a very
simple recipe for fried banana. Just throw
in some butter into a frying pan, sprinkle
cinnamon and brown sugar, then add
banana which I cut in 1/2 and then into
1/4 pieces. Fry em up and viola!
So tonight after class I came home
and decided to try it as a little treat
and boy oh boy, delicious! The recipe
also says to drizzle honey but I didn't
like the way it taste with honey, it
doesn't need it if you ask me.

And did it snow last night? Not a mere
3-5 inches but someone told me 19
inches was measured in Central Park
and I believe it!

I LOVE

2011-01-26T20:33:00.001-05:00

Snow days!
My sinuses have knocked me off my feet
since last Friday and having the day off
today has been wonderful. I've alternated
with cleaning and watching the 1st
season of "Dexter." Its a Showtime
original series about a "good-hearted"
killer. I am HOOKed. What can I say I've
always been drawn to morbid stuff, when
I was a teenager I spent a lot of time
reading about real life serial killers.
One of my earliest majors was
Criminal Justice. I wanted to study
the minds of murders and what makes
them that way? What percentage is
due the environment (nurture) vs nature?
Somehow once I transferred to Gallaudet
and they didn't have a CJ program I
switch to Psychology instead. Makes me
wonder if they had had that major
how different my life would've been?
Nonetheless I am glad I didn't maintain
that direction, I think it would've been
extremely depressing. Our current
criminal justice system is obviously
not working. It seems neither harsh
punishment nor rehabilitation has
been effective in reducing crime.
I don't know what the answer is but
I am glad its not a part of my
professional career.

So snow, snow away. Give me more
hours to study for my 1st quiz!
Help me memorize the body cavities
and their organs. Along with all the
anatomical terms and sectional planes.

Lastly as I write Baba and Jack are
"a-hunting" (imitates elmur fudd) for
an used car for me. Jack sent me a
bunch of links with car possibilities
over the last 24 hours. While I really
want a ford mustang its not in the
price range. It looks like at this
present time a choice between a
Jetta or an Eclipse. See see....

A worthwhile day

2011-01-24T00:17:00.001-05:00

I spent the day doing lessons for both of the
schools I teach at. Got 2 week's worth done.
This makes me very happy not to have to
worry about what I will teach for the next
2 weeks. Even though it wasn't long ago
that I wasn't in the mood to go back
to work. But I am glad I still enjoy teaching
a lot. I really care on the ability to make my
class stimulating as we'll as effective
instructions. I still need to research different
teaching styles. In a way it is good being
a student again, I see my teachers
in a much different light than before. I
still don't like the new online Blackboards
though. And I hate having to set up new
templates every semester :( blah!

In other news, Netflix is painfully but slowly
getting on board with online viewing options
in terms of subtitles. And under the option of
instant viewing, Starz has a good
share of subtitled movies to chose from. Its a
hit or miss. You have to check each movie
to see if under streaming it even has
SUBTITLES? If yes, you're good
to go. So far I haven't been able to watch
any tv shows. My guess is they rely
heavily on CC than subtitles. This
means Netflix hasn't gotten the codec
for CC yet. As to why? I don't know.

I did some reviewing on A&P tonight
and right now what I have left to
cover and learn is the body's
main cavities and sub cavities.
Specifically what organs they
contain? Memory has never been
my forte. I think I actually need to use
a concrete, tactile model than
relying on the illustrations from
the text book. A 3-D concept
would help me a lot. I have a
quiz this coming Thursday and I
really want to do well.

Alrighty, good-night to everyone
in cyberland :}

Movie Reviews

2011-01-23T00:33:00.019-05:00

Over the holiday break, I watched a lot of movies and now I feel like playing film critic

SALT starring Angelina Jolie about a KGB sleeper was pretty good to watch. A lot of action and fast paced scenes. Not heavily invested in a complicated story line and superficially touches the feelings from the Cold War era. I did like that the end leaves open to the possibility of a sequel. Overall if you're not in the mood to think a lot and want lots of excitement, then watch this.

SHREK-FOREVER AFTER was a blast to watch with Mom. The storyline of this Shrek edition deals with the possibilities of what Shrek's and Princess Fiona had never met and fell in love? It was a scream to watch. Mr. Pussboots and Donkey as usual keep you in stiches and I thou
ght Princess Fiona's alternative life was terrifically done. It was great fun to watch. I recommend this for when you need a laugh and enjoy letting the film do all the work.

SWEET DREAMS a biopic movie about the life and death of Patsy Cline that I watched with Baba was really well done. I love Jessica Lange and seeing Ed Harris when he was younger and a lot cuter with hair was a nice plus. Ever since I watched the movie WALK THE LINE about Johnny and June Cash, I have become a sucker for country singers life stories. And along the way I stumble across a song or two that I add to my music collection. I thought they did a bang up job with this story and was sad to see her die at the end from the typical plane crash that claimed many singers' lives from the 50s & 60s.

YOU DON'T KNOW JACK first of all I thought the title of this movie was clever in itself. And who doesn't wanna see Al Pacino (has he ever made a bad movie?) It was again a terrific biopic movie and little did I know the history behind this man and how he became known as Dr. Death. I have always been a supporter of assisted suicide when it comes to alleviating the pain of a living death or to avoid the lost of identity of a person and their abilities to be cognitive. No one should suffer a long painful death, a person should be able to leave this world with their dignity and to spare their family more pain too. If we have the sense to put down an animal when its old and in pain, shouldn't a person who is old and in pain be allowed to leave the world in their own fashion? This was in my opinion a thought provoking and eye opening film.

Mary and Max a film inspired by the writer's real life pen pal who happened to be autistic and lived in NYC. It was a unique movie to watch and had sort of a weird vibe to it. As my Grandmother (Baba) said "It was a WEIRD movie to watch." I myself found it to be bittersweet and enjoyed that it touched on many somewhat taboo topics. This isn't the kind of movie kids would enjoy, only grown up kids like myself. I loved Max(well's) character because he reminds me of so many different people who I have met over the years. I think my Aunt Nancy should get this from Netflix, she and my Uncle David would like this movie. If you're in the mood for weird and at times sweet, then watch this.

HAPPINESS wow, I loved this movie. It is about a multi layered, dysfunctional family and dared to approach the issue of pedophlia. I found the depth of this movie and the common human themes found in all families very relatable. The annoyingly sister who has everything (a husband, kids and white picket fence) and the other sister, extremely successful, highly desired and a 3rd that everyone wonders will she ever get married are all the kinds of personalities we've encountered here and there. The father who liked young boys is an actor named Dylan Baker and he played the part so believably. I think he and William H Macy should play brothers in another movie. I was disappointed to read that the Sundance Festival refused to accept this movie, tsk tsk. If you're the kind of movie viewer who votes republican and has a large collection of Disney movies, this isn't the film for you. Otherwise enjoy.

ROBINHOOD starring Russell Crowe who as Jack stated "poor guy, he can't seem to find a movie to star in from this decade." but nonetheless, Crowe always seems to do well from period pieces and from what I understand, this version is the most "historically" accurate account of the Robinhood story. It takes place during the at the very end of the 1100s in England and as usual, lots of action packed scenes, blood and gore, men fighting men. The common Russell Crowe formula of the underdog becoming a leader. I found it at times to be a little long for me but was still glad I watched it.

INCEPTION a so called science fiction film (not really) but anyways it stars Leonardo DiCaprio and I at first had to force myself to watch it. Overall this movie did not keep me captivated and I only watched it because Jack was watching it. It was okay. I much prefer Leo's other movie SHUTTER ISLAND now that's a great mind twister of a movie which I have seen 2x in the past 6 months. I would recommend SHUTTER ISLAND over INCEPTION any day.

So there you have it, and this completes my movie reviews ;-)

Taking on the challenge

2011-01-22T00:39:00.001-05:00

Last night was my 1st science class in years
and I left feeling so invigorated! I have always
shied away from science because historically
I've sucked at it.

I remember during my intake exam at my Deaf
high school (MSSD) that I was told as an
incoming freshmen my science skills were
of a 6th grade level. Everywhere else
academically I've always had a good
understanding or enough to get by with
a C or better. But science usually made me shudder.

Funny thing though, I've being a major astronomy
buff and physics fan all my life. But I still
view the area of Biology as the one area I
would never succeed at. And don't get me
started on Chemistry which is too much like
Trigonometry and Pre Calculus, all are
formula based and visualization of
spatial/abstracts required, that I don't
think even now I could master.

But let me tell you I am in LOVE! I was
eating up the anatomy terminology like
it was candy. Partly because I've always
paid detail attention to anatomy related
info during my college years. Plus ever
since I got my Masters in ASL and
studied linguistics and language
acquisition I not longer fear learning
other languages or a set of terminology
used in a particular field. I know what
to look for. I remember in middle
school and at MSSD, even in college
opening up the 1st page of a biology
book and instantly wanting to fall
asleep or was bored to death. I didn't
understand the words and I sure as
heck didn't have the patience to
learn them. Even if I could of
memorized terminology I don't think I
could have mastered the concepts
behind them. I think in some ways
this was due to my un-diagnosed ADD.
Already having a short attention span
and low frustration threshold didn't help.

I am grateful my professor last night
didn't start his class off with the
traditional route of cells and
membranes, ugh! Instead he dove
into anatomical terms and I really
liked it! I did still feel intimidated
but I have one thing I didn't have
before. Was it a brain? A heart?
Courage? Nope, I have Confidence!
That I will do whatever it takes to
succeed. And I am glad its a field I feel
passionate about.

So I didn't sleep much last night, too
excited. I even did the homework and
I am still not finish. This isn't one of
those 1 page worksheets done in 10
minutes. But a few hours and did I
mind? Hell no!?! And earlier this
evening when I came home and getting
dinner started I started sprouting
anatomical terminology to Jack while
pointing to my body to demonstrate
where the references were to?

And for the past few days, I've
also been very spoiled, having
access to a car to commute to work
and school. Its made me all the
more excited to move in March.
Its time I upgraded my surroundings.
I realize that while I pride myself as a
person who makes lemonade out of lemons.
Sometimes I forget to say, "this
is not enough. I deserve
more." For a long time and even
now I have seen myself as poor.
There has never been a major time
in my life where money was truly
a luxury. Don't get me wrong my
Grandparents did/do spoil me in
their own way. But I am not demanding
or ask for things I don't consider a
necessity. I would never want to take
away from someone else's quality of
life. I don't believe in bleeding someone
dry, just because you can. Anyways
I am learning to change my thinking
to the possibility I don't have to
struggle financially for the rest of
my life as I have. And for the next
few years, I am still gonna be really
poor as a student but that's fine. I've got
plenty of practice at it :]

The hudson at its finest!

2011-01-06T16:21:00.000-05:00

A 2nd Masters on my horizon

2011-01-05T15:36:00.001-05:00

Well folks, I stumbled across accidently
what will be my new major, Occupational
Therapy (OT)! Yep, I was looking in the job ads
for ASL related work when I came across
an ad for HKNC (Helen Keller National
Center) in LI. They were looking for an OT
and the pay was 75K! I remember one OT
from my old job at MD School for the Deaf
and decided to research it. When I did
the light bulb went off and I had the "aha!"
moment. This is what I should be doing!

There is a common misunderstanding
about what OT is exactly. The term
occupation can be misleading because
it isn't just used to describe what a
person does for a living but rather
what they do that occupies their time.
It could be work related or everyday
living or even recreationally. OT is very
broad field and isn't the same as PT
(physical therapy) which works primarily
on a person physically. OT works on
promoting the well being and abilities
of a person in any or all areas of their life.

OT work in schools, hospitals, community
organizations, senior citizens homes or
assisted living centers. They work with
people who may have a degenerative
disease or car accident victim. They may
work with a person in terms of mental
well-being or help them develop social
skills. There's much to choose from.

Tomorrow I have an appt with a school
admission dept to see if I can enroll in
some classes this spring. I will not be
able to start the MA program till I
complete the pre-requisitions. A lot of
science (anatomy and physiology stuff)
as well a medical administrative and
theory/philosophies. I need to get
started asap so I can hopefully start the
MA program in fall 2012. Lucky for me
my BS in pyschology will help cover
some of the pre-reqs but only a few.
I have about 10 to 12 classes I must take
in order to be accepted into the MA
program.

I am very excited because for the past
few years I've been mulling over whether
or not to go back for a 2nd MA. I do enjoy
teaching ASL but it was never my "passion."
As an OT I would still be teaching but in a
1 on 1 situation and I feel this will be a
much more rewarding career. Besides
I will have more work opportunity and
finally, finally make a decent living too!

In addition, now that most baby boomers
are approaching retirement age, this field
is one of the few that will keep growing
despite the economy's ebbs and flow.
This is the 1st time in a long time I
have felt excited about my future.
And about going back to school. And
while I will incur more debts it will be
worth it in the long run.

My biggest challenge will be science.
I have NEVER been good at it, esp
biology and more so chemistry.
Thank god this field is not dependent
on chemistry or I would be SOL! I've
already order copies of "dummies guide
to anatomy and physiology" to help
get me started. Plus if I review Latin
pre and suffixes this should help me
with the medical terms. And my aunt
is a doctor and she has given me
permission to pick at her brain if I have
questions and believe me I will!

Funny all these years I have always
admire my friends who are part of
the medical field. And I've been
fascinated with medical science
but never attempted to try to get a
degree in this because of my lack
of confidence. But I won't let that stop me
now that I've found a field that I feel I
can do well in and be passionate about.

So as they say "onwards and upwards!"

Welcome 2011!

2011-01-01T15:29:00.000-05:00

ha ha!

Wonders of nature

2010-12-30T13:14:00.001-05:00

In the past month I have been privy to
experience 2 different natural phenomenas.
1st was the spectacular lunar eclipse
a few weeks ago. Jack and I stayed up
till 2am to witness it and it was breath-
taking! Especially when the moon turned
orange/red! I tried to snap photos but
my camera wasn't strong enough to capture
a clear shot. Bummer because it was a
clear night and the moon was awesome.

The 2nd event was a few days ago on
the 26th when NYC was dumped 20 inches
of snow. When it was coming down, Jack &
I bundled up in layers and took a quick
walk around the block in all that snow &
wind and it was absolutely invigorating! I
was laughing and panting as we trekked
through the knee high deep snow. Its a
real workout you know. Jack face was
all bunched up but to me, I didn't mind the
cold, it just served as a reminder how lucky
we are to be alive!

My New Year's Resolutions Possibilites...

2010-12-18T09:24:00.000-05:00

1- stop eating fast food- I normally don't
eat it more than 1 or 2xs a week but still
that's 1 too many times

2- stop biting my nails! Part of the
problem why I never succeeded in this
is because I would let the nails
grow past my fingertips. For some
reason the feelings of nails bothers
me, especially when I close my hand
to make a fist, it really weirds me out.
But I would like to stop so I could
occasionally get a manicure and have
color painted nails.

3- stop wasting time on lost causes
or people which is self explanatory.
I tend to not give up on things/people
even when its not in my best interest.
Loyalty is a good thing but I have to
learn when its time to let go.

4- finish my movies, I am mad at myself
for not doing so already!

5- teach my family basic ASL phrases
& fingerspelling so I don't feel so left
out during my visits. I don't expect
them to be fluent, but an occasional
phrase or finger spelled word could
make a world of difference in my life. And
I won't force anyone in my family to sign, I
only ask if they might consider it? I've
thought about creating small mini lessons
and posting them on youtube. This way
they could watch it any time.

6- find a pet friendly place for my
next apt so I can bring Tom my
Bastard Kitty back here to NYC. What
can I say? I miss him! Teethmarks and all!

7- eat less meat, learn to like
more vegetarian foods. Basically for
2 reasons. 1, meat is expensive. 2, its healthier for me.

8- use coupons, coupons, coupons!
(I stopped using them when I moved
to NYC). Granted I use groupons,
discounts, promo codes, wait for sales
but groceries I've slacked off on.

9- revamp my lesson plans for 1 of
the schools I teach at, I am not currently
satisfied with it.

10-keep all my receipts so I can itemize
my tax return in 2011. Depending on
what I learn from my Uncle Robbie
because he does this for himself and
would be able to advise me if its a good
idea for me to do or not?

All of these resolutions are areas, I really
want to improve in. After all, isn't life
about chances to improve yourself
and become a well rounded person?

What's 'foreign' about sign language?

2010-12-17T15:50:00.004-05:00

A recent commentary by conservative radio host, Dom Giordano in response to the New York Tine article has many of us Deafies fuming! He basically states there is nothing "foreign about sign language." First of all, at least address the issue correctly and use ASL, because there are many different sign languages all over the world. So in a way, depending on which sign language you're referring to, may be foreign. And hello, we never claimed it was a foreign language but rather A language. That ASL developed with French influence and later Martha's Vineyard as well as numerous Deaf schools all over the country. He obviously is unaware but the A in ASL stands for American Sign Language.

Another area that shows Mr. Giordano clearly didn't do his homework. Had he, he would've realized that Higher Education has already rectify the misleading subject title Foreign Languages to Modern Languages. Which means languages used in the modern day world and numerous of them are used here in the United States every day! The term Foreign language is antiquated as apparently he is too with his backward approach to ASL. The beauty of living in this country, is the right to chose which language(s) you want to speak/use at any given time. That millions upon millions who immigrated to this country in the past or present still use their native or preferred language at home and among peers.

Now the next part that he tries to dismantle ASL credibility is with his attack on Deaf Culture and the validity of it. He basically insinuates we are deluding ourselves from our assigned handicaps by mainstream society. He then ask if other "should people who are blind and paralyzed be pushing for their own culture?" Uh they already have as I know there is a lingo speak and shared culture among many paraplegics rugby players as evident in the movie Murderball. In this film, the players share parts of their lives that no one else (able bodied) could understand completely. They tear down the veil of pity that most people want to impart on them. As for the Blind community, I came across this site which I do not think Mr. Giordano if he ever reads it, would still argue that everyone in America lives this way or that American Blind people live the same everyday lives as the rest of America does. And having been active in the Deaf-blind world, I know they too have a culture that could be seen as an extension of both Deaf culture and Blind culture or a culture in their own rights depending on who you ask.

Mr. Giordano, a culture can often arise within a group of people who share similarities due to oppression/discrimination they've experienced. These prejudices are often based on physical characteristics or belief systems that perhaps the majority does not know about or share. Its not limited to geography or what food is eaten which are in some ways superficial as all human beings originated from the same place. Your statement "What harmful nonsense [in response to Deaf people reference to cultural genocide]. The drive to aid people to overcome handicap is not an attempt to demean them, but to enable them to have and fuller life." Our language, culture and history is not nonsense. We don't personally feel that our lives are less than because we are Deaf. But rather our culture encourages to focus on what we can do. I can't speak for the others, paraplegics, blinds or whoever else is labeled "handicap."

Mr. Giordano, I earned my Masters in ASL from the Teacher's College, Columbia University who I doubt share your views on 'sign language.' My Master studies included both linguistic knowledge and teaching methods. Both legitimate subjects in the real world we share. In addition, I have been teaching ASL professionally for the past 6 years including undergrads for the recent 4 out of 6 years. These students take my ASL course at higher institutions, not the local Y to meet their modern language requirements. And not everyone earns an easy A and does well in my class. My curriculum is 3 parts, ASL the language, ASL linguistic properties and Deaf culture knowledge. I strive to take away the stereotype that ASL is a hobby, that ASL is broken English or that ASL is all gesture and easy to acquire. Also many of my students have told me they feel ASL will be useful in their chosen field because honestly, you never know when you'll run into a ASL user recreationally or professionally. Some have had Deaf family members or socialize or work with a Deaf individuals. Others are encouraged or modify their future plans to be aware and inclusive towards the Deaf community. To me learning ASL wouldn't be any different than learning a language for heritage reasons or your chosen profession will take you abroad. And what about students who choose to become Teachers? Doctors? Lawyers? you don't think they won't ever cross path with a Deaf individual?

Every since Blondie sent me Mr. Giordano's article, I have been ticked off. It only perpetuates the already existing ignorance on what being Deaf is all about. I was glad to see Queen Alpo already wrote a response to this hurtful and bias article. Funny I don't write every day about Deaf politics and believe me there's plenty. But this particular case, I had to stand up for myself and for my peers.

Lastly in the words of a famous sport's writer Ford Frick "Hear only the things you should hear - be deaf to others." So I ask you readers out in cyberland, please do me a favor and turn a deaf ear to Mr. Giordano. I gaurentee, the silence will be golden.

Yay its SNOWING :]

2010-12-13T19:32:00.001-05:00

I LOVE snOw!
Bring it on Mother Nature, put my
fantastic Ugg Boots to use along with
the warmest winter coat I've ever own
I am roaring for
snOw.

"An ode to Winter"
by mE

Ugh, Jury Duty

2010-12-11T14:04:00.000-05:00

Oh come on! I already about 6 months
ago got out of it by playing the Deaf
card. Even had a doctor write a letter of
proof that I am Deaf and would require
an interpreter! Now today I got a new
more official looking summon that
has the "don't f*ck with me* appearance.
So now I've emailed my bosses to find
out if lowly adjuncts such as myself are
paid while serving jury duty and on top
of that I will have to jump through many
hoops to obtain a terp. Another option is
to file for a postponement till summer
when I am not swamped with work.

Grr, Jury duty!

A great quote

2010-12-03T16:04:00.001-05:00

By Mary Taylor Moore
"Sometimes you have to get to know someone really well to realize you're
really strangers."
So true

Say NO to

2010-11-29T09:17:00.001-05:00

http://www.nydailynews.com/ny_local/2010/11/29/2010-11-29_bloombergs_school_pick_cathie_black_could_get_state_approval_in_controversial_ed.html

Cathie Black as our future NYC chancellor!
What is wrong with this city government?
I sure hope David Steiner doesn't grant
Mrs. Black the waiver she needs to become
chancellor. We don't need someone with
zero educational background overseeing
the NYC public schools. This isn't a
magazine giant (Hearst), this is a
SCHOOL SYSTEM! I am tired of these
political or financial bigwigs telling us
educators how to do our job. How about
these "know it all" spend a month in
a classroom and see 1st hand how
hard it is to be a teacher. That relying
on state or city mandated standardized
tests is not akin to a business tool!
Teachers here and all across America
are being treated like sales reps that
have a monthly status quo to reach.
And when they fail to do so (and not
due to the lack of supplies or
support) but the lack of promising
test results it only serves to undermine
the already existed low morales.
We the public lose. Mrs. Black
won't lose anything. As a matter of
fact she will gain another shinning
spot on her resume. These cronies
need to stop posting there friends to
government roles and start focusing
on people who deserve these positions!
Ugh I am disgusted by the lack of
humility Mrs. Black shows and the fact
she would actually accept this position.
Shame on you Bloomberg for even
appointing her as chancellor! You are
NOT King Henry the VIII. In this realm
we expect qualified appointments,
not business deals or elbow rubbing :(

MICA Photos

2010-11-17T14:57:00.005-05:00

There are really no photos with me in them except these from MICA, it was extremely hetic at the time!

Here is me and Annie watching this terrific modern dancer!
Uh, I have no idea why I look so disgusted or what I am referring to? 2 what? Peace? huh? But nonetheless it was cool to hang out with John Kovacs as we hadnt seen each other in years!

Yep, I am just enjoying the rewards of all the hard work we did setting up for the Fashion Runway

This dancer was so elegant!

Belated Lady Gaga Photos

2010-11-17T14:20:00.006-05:00

Photos from the Lady Gaga concert taken in July by Staci!

Here's me and Blondie waiting excitedly for the next Lady Gaga song despite the lousy seats and 1 of the terps being terrible! Shame on you Madison Sq Gardens!

Lady Gaga being her usual weird self, playing the piano in a way that would make Liberace proud!

BFF!!

Annie & Staci all grins

Annie & Blondie nicely tanned, damn why can't I tan too???

Lady Gaga in one of her infamous outfits

Our view, yep pretty lame for a bunch of Deafies who rely on their sight and not our ears primarily! You think a venue that size could squeeze about 10 Deafies somewhere a little closer right???

Thank goodness for Staci zoom feature on her camera and despite the zoom this was the best we could do for photos!

I loved the stage props once I could see them from the photos. Live it was like an inch or smaller from my viewpoint.

Lady Gaga, how do you wear those tortuous heels???

Extra Halloween Photos

2010-11-17T14:09:00.004-05:00

Watch out! You don't want to mess with this Alien who's half human, and half Andorian and enjoys the heat from radioactive materials

Fellow monsters

God I love these 2-D folks!

Aww, I don't think she will bite

Party on!

Damsel in distress!

Apollo Theatre

2010-11-10T17:36:00.000-05:00

The other night at the Apollo Theatre was
a free panel discussion about careers on
and off Broadway. Martin ask me to go with
him. It was neat to enter the famous theater
the same one that has breathed life into
many famous performers. Unfortunately Martin
did not want to stay because he had
misunderstood and thought this was a Deaf
based event with Deafies on the panel. Not
hearing folks with an ASL terp. After 15 mins
or so we left. It was too dark for him anyways.
I didn't mind because I was just happy to see
him and catch up. Its awesome having a
Jewish friend here in NYC. We are already
going to 2 different Hannukah related
events in early December. Potato latkas here
I come! Give me some sour cream and apple
sauce and I am good to go!

Last weekend Jack & I went to the Greek
Bazaar with David, Nancy & Bobby. As
usual we had to wait in line for like an
hour. By the time we go into the main
area to sit down and eat our Greek
food I was famished! I literally inhaled
my pistichio (sp?)! Jack of course didn't
want his. As far as I was concerned
that was just dandy, more for me!
We didn't stay too long afterwards simply
because Jack's back was acting up and
my head was ringing from a small head
cold. Still it was nice to attend again.

I am happy to say my cold is gone now.
I thank Baba for the clementines she sent
back with me. Along with dry mango, delish!
Both loaded with a ton of vitamin Cs!

Well I am really looking forward to
Thanksgiving and a few days of R&R.

Also today my bastard kitty, Tom had
surgery on his paw. He has had a chronic
infection for a few years now that we
decided as a family to have part of his
paw removed. I am worried because he
is 15 yrs old. I hope it isn't too much of
a shock for him? I am ever grateful to
Baba & Mom for taking care of him.
I swear the next apt I move to must
be cat friendly! I can't stand being apart
from him anymore. Its been about 3 yrs
now and when I dream, I dream of Tom.
He's been with me since I was 21 yrs old!

Well I am off to teach a class tonight, ciao!

Halloween 2010

2010-11-03T12:34:00.004-04:00

Sometimes too much of a good thing can make you blue

Other species join us in having a grand time

Jack wants YOU to know that Uncle Picard needs you in the Starfleet Federation!

Oh no, a prisoner from the Department of Erections has escaped!!!

The gang-Blondie, Jack, me, Staci & Shannon! (Eddie missing)

Jack wants YOU to know these are really happy folks!

Jack & Blondie, dancing the night away

How can I be blue when I am with you???

DeCamp bus #66 blows chunks

2010-11-03T09:50:00.000-04:00

So this morning I figured why not
take the DeCamp 66 bus to work,
gives me extra time in the morning.
I arrive to Time Square without any
problems, grab an egg sandwich with
time to spare. The bus is suppose to
leave at 9am. 9:05am, no bus. 9:10am
no bus. 9:15am, all of us passengers
are getting annoyed then finally,
finally it rolls in at 9:20am! Wtf?!?
The arrival time to my job was suppose
to be 9:25am and now it will be
closer to 9:45am. I will now have
to rush to pick up the laptop and
start class by 10am. I hate being rushed!

Hope you all voted yesterday? I did and
it paid off, no Paladino w00t! And
thank goodness the Democrats did
not lose majority in the senate.
I am however disappointed the
Republicans aka a bunch of fat white
men are now running the House of
Representatives. The last thing we
need are these morons undoing the
Democratic attempts to clean up
their messes from the early 2000
when the Bush clan along with
the greedy bankers ruined the
economy! How can the American
people expect Obama to clean
up the Republican's screw up in
only 2 yrs? We knew things were bad
and it isn't Obama's fault these GOPs
"left the seat up" for the rest of us
to fall into the cold toilets!

Halloween weekend was a success in
more than 1 way. I was able to grade
all 100+ midterms and still celebrate
Halloween. Saturday night I transformed
myself into an Andorian Starfleet
Federation member. I don't think there
has ever been an Andorian in Starfleet?
Maybe I'll spark that possibility for
future Star Trek series or movies?
We all met up at Blondie's place to
get ready. It took me over 2 hours to
put the blue makeup on my hands and
face, neck, chest area etc etc.. But it
was so cool once I finished! Jack
kept teasing me that he was a higher
rank than me. Because his star trek
shirt had 2 bars making him a commander
and mine only had 1 bar. Hmph!
Jack was so much fun to be with at
the party, he had a few drinks and was
suddenly everyone's best friend.
Extremely friendly, outgoing and he
danced with me and Blondie. He was
signing a mile a minute! Blondie was
surprise at how much he knew. Makes
me want to have Jack drink more often
not to the point he's drunk but a buzz
wouldn't hurt.

This weekend, Jack & I are going
to the annual Greek Bazaar. It
will be good to see the family.

Good morning Mr. Moon

2010-10-25T07:37:00.000-04:00

What will you be for Halloween?

2010-10-19T16:35:00.001-04:00

Well I am still assembling bits to my
costume. I am going as an Adorian
Federation Member. I got the classic
Star Trek Red Dress, the knee high
black boots. I also brought blue
polymer clay to make the Andorian
antennas. And I ordered the Avatar
blue make up kit (enough to do
my face, hands etc etc). Now I am
waiting on my phaser to arrive, whee!

This year I am actually excited to
celebrate Halloween. Last year
I wasn't. Dunno what changed but
glad it did. I am still deciding what
to do over Halloween weekend?
The famous NYC Halloween parade
takes place on Halloween which
unfortunately this year falls on Sunday
Oct 31st :( Blondie is planning to go
and I would like to go too but I
have to get up so early the next
morning. What's a deafie gal like
me to do? Be responsible? Or have
fun? She also wants to attend the
Masquerade Macabre on Saturday
night, the 30th. http://geminiandscorpio.com/events.html Looks
interesting
just wish it wasn't all the way down
in Brooklyn! And I am not sure if I
can alter my costume to fit the theme?

For Friday night the 29th, I may do the
Halloween Bar Pub crawl here in the
city with Jack.

Decisions, decisions!

Bite me Carl Paladino!

2010-10-13T17:21:00.001-04:00

Grr, I can't believe the nerve of this NY
hopeful Governor. First he attacks the
GLBT community with his recent
remarks about how he doesn't want
his children to be brainwashed that
homosexuality is ok. Then he comments
on the Gay Pride Parade as "disgusting."
Now he has issued a letter of apology
and while he remains against Gay
marriages, he will "fight for all gay
New Yorkers' rights." Whatever!
You can't expect anyone to believe
that a homophobe such as yourself
would fight on behalf of the GLBT
community! Come on, does he
seriously think that voters buy this
crap he's shoveling out? And its
moronic that he would make these
remarks in light of the recent horrific
attacks on 2 gay teens and 1 male
adult last week in the Bronx!

And that poor kid Clementine (sp?)
who committed suicide when his
asshole roommate streamed live
through the web his sexual encounters.
I don't know what's wrong with people
these days! This is a big enough
country to accommodate all of us.
If you don't want to live your life
a certain way then don't. But
at least have the decency to be
respectful towards other walks
of life. See I grew up during a time
when being Gay was hush hush,
especially in my hometown. I
was blessed with a Mom who knew
God or the life force doesn't judge
by color, race, creed etc., etc.. So
why should we? I've attended
Gay weddings (the best kind there is!)
and drag shows. And met some of the
nicest folks you ever want to meet.
Most of them even had children but
later came out of the closet. I do know
there is still a lot of fear for millions
of Gay Americans in this country who
shared Carl's backwards mentality.
I haven't forgotten Ryan White or
the many others who have been
brutalized for being themselves.

So Carl, I can only hope that voters
will not buy this crap. And think his
homophobic behavior is suitable for
our next Governor here in NY!

And lastly Carl, it would be hilarious should
your kids grow up to be gay despite all
of your backwards attempt to "brainwash"
them into being as hateful and closed-
minded as you are! Perhaps this will
come back to haunt you when they say
"Dad, I have something to tell you...."

A great bumper sticker

2010-10-05T17:00:00.000-04:00

I saw today a great bumper sticker that
read "if progress means moving forward,
what does congress mean?" true true!

Well MICA (www.micarunway) is only days
away. I was sad to learn that the reality
star I had contacted won't be able to attend.
It would've been such a neat experience to
have her come. But that's life, its full of
minor disappointments. However I am
still excited to be a part of this 3 day event.
The past few Saturdays filming has been
awesome. I feel so at home behind a
camera lens. I enjoy especially trying to
take shots that allow the viewers to see
through the eyes of the models, what they're
going through etc etc.. I also successfully
got several contributing sponsors. I wasn't
able to get one alcohol company that
seemed interested in our event and then
without any explanation they declined.
I sent a follow up email to inquire why
our event was declined? This way I can
avoid this rookie mistake in the future.
My motto when it comes to fundraising
or asking for product donations is
"If you don't ask, you don't get!"
Its true. The worst thing that can happen
is they deny my request. This and
past experience of fundraising has
tempted me to learn how to be a good
grant writer. It would be a valuable
skill to have in any regard. Especially
within the Deaf world where we are
often overlooked or an after thought.

My classes are going well. I've changed
some techniques this year and I think
its helping. I do still struggle with how
to make my midterm and final exam more
challenging? On www.ratemyprofessor.com
I still have high marks and terrific
comments left by former students. They
all had the same remark that my class
exams are an easy. That does not sit
well with me because I am teaching
college level, therefore I better find
a way to make them harder. Part of
it is that I always hand out a detailed
outline of what will be on the exam so
as long as the student actually use the
outline they do well. I have seen some
students obviously didn't use the outline
and it showed on their exams. So maybe
its a matter of the scoring system? I
am not sure but midterms are not far
off so I better get to it!

Jack's new car is a dream! I don't even
miss his old beamer. Yes it was a nice
car but this new one is amazing! I love
everything about it from the color of the
car exterior and interior to the size etc etc.
I will have to snap some photos and post
at a later date. Jack did a great job! I
admire his ability to work on cars and
his mechanical brain!

Well the 2 train is here and its off
to the Bronx to teach!

Only in NY!

2010-10-02T17:44:00.000-04:00

Ask and ye shall receive? Maybe...

2010-09-28T16:47:00.000-04:00

Well the past week and a half I have been
so busy with work and looking for
sponsors for MICA 2010! Www.micarunway.com
This will be my 3rd time volunteering for
MICA and I am loving every minute of it!
I may have even gotten one of my
favorite reality stars to attend too!
I can't say who but either you'll
love or hate this person.

Life with Jack is good. We seem to have
settle into a nice routine of work, school
and living together. Its awesome we are
working as a team now!

I must say being back in NYC still thrills
me to no end. Despite the cost of living
and the ever increasing MTA fare hikes!
And the overcrowding. This city still
#1 in my book.

Recently Jack & I watched Spartacus:
Blood & Sand by Encore. Wow,
this movie is all sex, violence and
phrases like "Jupiter's cock!" which
is like their version of swearing.
The blood baths are amazing! I
watched the special features which
lucky was subtitled! The writer was
glad to have a lot of freedom to write
an R rated series and boy oh boy did they!
A guilty pleasure for anyone who
enjoys Gladiator related stories!
If you don't mind a lot of death and
sex, do que it in your netflix!

Freeway Fliers

2010-09-20T08:50:00.000-04:00

In todays Metro newspapers there was
a short article called "An assault on our
education." Basically it talks about
how many colleges & universities have
developed a corporate mentality when
it comes to administration. Yeah, no
kidding! The tutition rate has almost
tripled in the past decade alone! It also
mentions a new term being used
"Freeway fliers" where part-time *ding ding
ding that's me* instructors are commuting
from 1 institution to another. And because we
have enormous teaching loads, the
quality of education can suffer. There is also
additional pressure to give good grades also
because student evaluations have become
more important. So if you're an unpopular
part time teacher, watch out, popularity
rules and you better be cool.

The other day one of my former students
told me how many students hate signing
in front of the whole class. I was a little
surprised but I feel this is necessary. It
keeps them on their toes. But I have
decided to do less of that and more of
informally observing the students while
I roam the room. At the same time I
won't completely rid my policy of
signing in front of the class.

In other news I have been mulling over
whether or not I should go for a 2nd
MA? Part of me dreads the idea of going
back to school! I feel schooled out
still! If I take a class, I want it to be fun,
something I will enjoy. I am grateful for
my jobs but I yearn to earn more. And I
really don't want to take on more debts
when my student loans already exceed
50K. I think I may look to online classes
as a possibility. That way I could do it
at my own pace and not have to worry
so much about getting ASL terps etc., etc..
It already feels like I will be paying of
my student loans for the rest of my life!

Enough already! I am stressing myself out
over this. I gotta just focus on working
and living right now. I truly have a hard
time relaxing these days. I miss my
carefree summer days!

I also had a bad dream about my Bastard
Kitty, Tom. How I was visiting him and he
looked funny to me and I couldn't figure out
why at 1st. Then it dawned on me his cute
little pink nose with a spot was gone! It
was like another cat had ripped off he poor
little nose and cheek/whisker areas. I was
mortified and asked the woman (unknown to
me) if her other cat had done this to my boy?
She said no. Made me wonder if my cat is
ok? I know he's very happy at Mom's but I
can't help missing him.

Why my Mom rules

2010-09-13T10:17:00.001-04:00

Today is Mom's birthday and I thought I
take a few minutes to share why my Mom
Is #1!
My Mom has always been my biggest
cheerleader. She stands behind me and
always says "you can do it!"
My Mom taught me how to be a good
friend. To accept people, flaws and all.
My Mom is a terrific cook and has
taught me how to be as well.
My Mom is a card shark, where do you
think I picked up my skills?!
My Mom is intelligent, always reading
and knows all the answers on Jeopardy
and trivia pursuit.
My Mom knows how to stretch a dollar
and make her money last. As well
as ways to save money. Where to
shop to get the best bargains.
My Mom has a real knack for interior
decorating and has numerous times
over the years, helped me organized
my infamous clutter piles.
My Mom has always picked me up
when I've been down or felt defeated.
She's always been there for me.
So Mom, thank you for being my Mom
and again Happy Birthday!

Before & After Photos

2010-09-11T22:28:00.000-04:00

All in the name of Allah

2010-09-08T14:28:00.001-04:00

In the past 2 days there's been a lot
of coverage by the media about Koran
burning. Apparently there's a church in
Florida that has plans to do a good old
fashion book burning on Sept 11th! They
want to burn copies of the Koran to send a
message to Islamic extremists. This idea
personally for me doesn't sit right. I have
always believed religions in general are
laced with moral values, its the fanatics
in any religion that destroys the
messages.

Besides ALL religions are open to
interpretations. Unfortunately in this
its the Arab world, the ones in power
(Men) who choose to abuse the
messages from the Koran. I don't think
God, Allah whatever name(s) you give
to the life force you pray to has any
view on violence, neither for or against.
Unfortunately in the Koran there are
109 verses that call Muslims to war
with non-believers. And a lot of
conflicting messages found in the
Koran such as violence to only be used
as self-defense but also slaughter any
non-believer in graphic details. What is
ironic is that some critics (both Muslims and
a few selected Christians) argue that the
Old Testament has many parallel
verses/ideas of violence as well.
But these views are very misguided
according to this link;
http://www.thereligionofpeace.com/Pages/Bible-Quran-Violence.htm

[Update] I did some more reading at this
link and I hadn't realized the history
behind Islamic faith.
http://www.thereligionofpeace.com/Quran/023-violence.htm
The brutality Islam has caused over
centuries. What's really sad is the
earlier parts of the Koran does have
a more neutral/positive approach but
the later parts promote destructions to
all non-believers.

So back to violence,
Violence among humans is a conscious
choice. Any religious figure/fraction
that hides behind spiritual intended
documents to promote violence are
cowards. Basically someone who can't
think for themselves. To use their
religion to justify criminal/destructive
behavior is inexcusable.

The Army General David Petraeus warns
that the book burning of the Korans
would endanger U.S. troops. That's pretty
stupid if you ask me. I mean first of all
why are we even there? Our mere presence
incenses things already. Does he honestly
think one small group of narrow minded
folks down south is going to turn the tides
any worst than they already are? Its not
like our soldiers are being welcomed in
these Arab countries with arms wide open
and suddenly burning the Koran would
change the already standing propaganda
of hate towards Americans.

And what about the mosque being built
near Ground Zero and all the controversy
its caused. Am I for or against. Its hard to
say. If I am for it, many families who lost
members to the 9/11 attacks feel its a
slap in the face. That the ultra liberals
are living in la la land. But if I am against
the building of the mosque, then am I
promoting racism? Do I let a few rotten
apples ruin the barrel? I know or have
worked with a few Muslims and they're
the nicest people you ever want to
meet. I don't forsee them or most
others having a "jihad" kind of day.
I think Muslims born over here have
been westernized compared to the ones
over there where they are the majority.
Their religious upbringing is quite
different and in a sense a lot less
literal in terms of the Koran. Although
I am sure that is not always the case.
As there are plenty of examples of
backwards thinking among non-Muslims
as well. But the fact that our country is
built upon religious freedom makes it hard
for me to decide what the right answer is.

Do I worry about the future in this country
and possible further attacks made by
cell terrorist, sure I do. Why it was only
last May that there was a man who
planned to set off a car bomb at Time Square
which I pass through there several
times a week. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Faisal_Shahzad. Quite scary
to even contemplate what
these extremist will do. And for those of
you who while watched the horror of 9/11
and acknowledge the travesty, but the
effects have worn off. Or perhaps still
don't fully comprehend the lengths
these "Muslim Soldiers" will go all in the
name of Allah. I recommend watching a
really good movie called "The Siege"
with Denzel Washington made pre 9/11
about this very topic. And while the
movies didn't do well in theaters largely
due to Muslim based groups protesting it,
it was rented by many on DVDs. Which
I think says a lot. We want to appear to
be politically correct outside, but in the
privacy of our homes we can be true to
ourselves.