My 50th birthday

This summer I had a wonderful time visiting friends in SC/NC it lifted my spirits tremendously. Then on August 24th (2 weeks after my bday) LAD threw my a surprised bday party with cake,  foods, cards and cash! And we played poker which made it the best bday ever!

I placed 4th.

I'm so happy to be in my 50s! And excited to see what this decade brings? 

Upcoming Election

This upcoming election is going to be a hard one for me. While I can't stand the orange buffoon. Kamala has not won me over because she's still pushing for a "two states" solution shows me she does not have the Jewish community back. Right after Oct 7th she was more worried about Islamophobia than what the the Jews were and still facing today! And telling me her husband is Jewish isn't anything more than tokenism! It doesn't impress me at all. Her choice of VP is my opinion is a disaster! 

Kamala performed very well last Tuesday debate but she needs to step it up for the Jewish community and stop placating these terrorists!

It feels like this election is all about choosing the lesser of the two evils...

Dysthymia and Compound Grief

In a few weeks I'll say goodbye to my 40s and I can't wait! Honestly it was the worst decade of my life!

Losing both my Mom and Baba,  Complicated Joseph, Edwin "Eddie" and my beloved Rosie Nova! Along with Wes Smile, what a ghastly way to die. A tree well! *shudders* and poor Neal he was a sweet old man who deserve better in his final days no thanks to his hearing sister!

Being down south with my close friends is doing wonders for my soul. With my life long Dysthymia and the above compound grief, having the change of scenery has improved my overall outlook!

I've always had a soft spot for the south since my high school days! At least here they don't support these domestic terrorists aka pro Hamas fans! I was honestly touched when a non Jewish friend said they would put "free the Israeli hostages" sticker on the back of their car! I'm crazy for miss Tequila and her family!

BLM is full of Antisemites!

https://jewishjournal.com/commentary/columnist/365749/answering-a-friend-who-becomes-an-antisemite/ 

Sad I've lost quite a lot of friends the last 6 months! 

I'll never forget or forgive some of my former BLM friends saying "I didn't realize you knew anyone in Israel" in regards to Oct 7th. My answer was "I didn't know you knew George Floyd or Brenna Taylor?" No they didn't but they still knew right from wrong during BLM but they don't apply that for us Jews? The double standards is getting old!

Rosie Nova

(Originally written on Jan 8th but I've been so heartbroken by her death I could not bear to repost till now)

Last night we finally buried my beautiful little girl Rosie who died suddenly on 12/21/23 at the age of 9. She was my heart. I hate goodbyes! It is so hard without her by my side. She was there when my Mom died suddenly in 2017 and then my beloved Baba (grandmother) in 2020. I would do anything to have another day with Rosie, my Mom and Baba! I'm heartbroken. When we buried Rosie last night, we buried a part of my heart with her. 

Rosie was

My little girl

My ballerina

My nesting doll

My perfect angel

My best friend

My heart

My Rosie Posey Mosey may you RiP next to my cat Tom. Mommy loves and misses you so much

My Country Tis of Thee!

As a kid you grow up hearing or seeing spoofs of songs or stories.

One of the ones I grew up with was a ditty of the song "My Country Tis of Thee"  

The original lyrics is as followed;

My country 'tis
This wee sweet land of liberty
Of thee I sing
Land where my fathers died
Land of the pilgrim's pride
From every mountainside
Let freedom ring

There's is more to the song but the above is the part everyone knows, I hope!?!

Now the version I grew up with goes like this

My country tis of thee, Sweet land of Germany, My name is Fricks! My father was a spy, Shot by the FBI, Oh what a horrible way to die! My name is Fricks

Now thinking about that ditty I realized it probably an insult to the Germans because various versions of the original song started after WWII! Makes a lot of sense!

I wonder if today's kids in NYC still recite the Pledge of the Allegiance? National pride to be an American seems lower these days and I'm not sure why? I'm proud to be an American!

My 1st Real Win For 2023

Since last fall I've been playing a lot more poker both in person and online. I'm getting better with my game but since my big win from Nov 2022, I haven't placed 1st or won any money until now.  

Tonight I decided to try a new online group for a cash game with a buy in of $30-300. I'm certainly not rich so I started with $80. For a while there I wasn't winning. In fact I had to go all in at 1 point because my bank was so low. And in the last 3 hours I played with a fun group of players. One guy DW, he was so chatty via the app and near the end was not so talkative after losing all of his cash and doing 2 more rebuys. He was heckling me when I 1st started to play. And it was clearly all men because the chat upon arrival was all talk about cum and wanking off etc etc. That died down with in the 1st 5 minutes and then DW was heckling me so much that I wrote. I'm just here to play and then he backed off and even said to relax and enjoy myself. Then I did.  I managed to end with over $440. But I still don't know what constitutes as a big pot? Cuz if you want to leave after winning a big pot you have to announce and then play 15 more hands. 

It is so surreal the world of poker but irl and online. I'm enjoying it tremendously and making lots of new friends a long the way too.

But more importantly having such a nice win tonight helped remind me.  I still got it! Heh heh! 

So far 2023 is off to a good start!

Derailment!

My life in the last 5 years has completely gone off the rails. While I may enjoy some career successes and advancements my home life has been in shambles. Never knowing if I'll get to stay or have to go. 

Breaking my ankle last August was hard but I'm so happy today I walked without a limp!

This year's holidays with my Sweetie has not gone well at all. I'm very disappointed. It is what it is. 

I just keep trying to move forward but the stress of an unstable home life has taken a tremendous toll on me. Either way it is coming to an end. 

I'm more than ready to say goodbye to 2022!