How "Evil" are YOU?

You Are 60% Evil

You are evil, but you haven't yet mastered the dark side. Fear not though - you are on your way to world domination.

How Evil Are You?

And if you want to test your American smarts, try this quiz as well;

You Are a Smart American

You know a lot about US history, and you're opinions are probably well informed. Congratulations on bucking stereotypes. Now go show some foreigners how smart Americans can be.

Are You a Dumb American?

Here's a cool site called My Heritage Face Recongnition- Celebrity matches that King sent me, its fun to try out different photos and see the results :D I tried one of my photos from last summer, and felt I closely resembled Holly Hunter (shape of her face), Jensen Ackles (the facial layout of eyes, nose and mouth) and Eva Longoria (the nose and mouth. Agree? Disagree?

The break from Clyde has served a purpose and has allowed me to get my affairs in order. I realize I tend to overstretch myself with plans with friends or Clyde and volunteering as well as working 3 jobs. I think Clyde and I spent too much time together in the past to the point I wasn't taking care of my responsibility and becomming unreliable for social engagements. I have to work on scheduling myself accordingly and learn to say "No" every now and then. Clyde doesn't seem to mind me taking this break and I am happy he is cool with it. Afterall if you aren't healthy or happy how can you date someone seriously when your life is a mess? I don't want Clyde to be my "savior" nor do I want to neglect other areas in my life that are important to me and give meaning to my life, makes my soul happier. Its nice to keep in contact with him through emails and reading his blog helps too.

Sent out a lot of resume last Mondays and already got 2 different companies contacting me for interview or possible work. This is good to know that my skills and resume is actually helping me find work now. I figure if I accept one of the offers which would start out pt here in Manhattan 2 days a week for 2 hour session, that would be a good way to build a rapport with this organization and possibly lead to FT work this summer or fall. See see?

Last but not least, this has been floating around on the net forever and for shits and giggles (yeah yeah, I stole the line from GI Jane the movie) I felt like posting it here, have fun!

A Dog's Diary

7 am - Oh boy! A walk! My favorite!

8 am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!

9 am - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!

Noon - Oh boy! The yard! My favorite!

2 pm - Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!

3 pm - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!

4 pm - Oh boy! Playing ball! My favorite!

6 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Mom! My favorite!

7 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Dad! My favorite!

8 pm - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!

9 pm - Oh boy! Tummy rubs on the couch! My favorite!

11 pm - Oh boy! Sleeping in my people's bed! My favorite!


A Cat's Diary

Day 183 of my captivity. My cars continued to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from clawing the furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another house plant.

Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded. Maybe I should try this at the top of the stairs.
&b p;
In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair. I must try this on their bed.

Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little kitty cat I was. This is not working according to plan.

There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary confinement throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More important, I overheard that my confinement was due to my powers of inducing something called "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit.

The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant. He speaks with them regularly, and I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. But I can wait.

It's only a matter of time.

PerlisFilms Debut!

You can finally check out my works at perlisfilms :D Any feedback much appreciated.

Hey Sharpe you asked me about Law and Order CI deaf episode, it will broadcast on March 20th at 9pm on NBC.

The next night will be the "200 years of Deaf History" on PBS at 9pm as well. This will be a great week for deaf tivo owners.

I am doing a lot better today. I went to a meeting last night and am excited to be a part of a new committee and planning things. I am a committee kinda girl. I enjoy working with my friends.

hmm what else? My apt is a HUGE mess but I will do deep cleaning this weekend, soon I am off to tutor the twins...

Pity Party is over

I have been in bed most of the weekend, feeling miserable about the breakup, money woes and just when it rains it pours! But I almost didn't come to work today but decided, enough is enough?! I cant let life bring me down. I gotta bounce back up and get into the swing of life. Last Thursday when I worked I felt a million times better. I should've kept more busy this past weekend but perhaps thats what I needed to do? 'Lie still and bleed a while?' A little self reflection goes a long way. Clyde and I have been emailing each other, contemplating on what we did wrong and how to make things right. I just wanted to let everyone who checked in on me and left me messages how much I appreciate your support. I just wish people would stop telling me what they want me to do and let me come to my own conclusions. I wouldn't have dated Clyde if my feelings for him weren't genuine. So for now, I ask to be allowed to decide for myself whether or not after the break we give it another go?

I did watch a lot of movies during the pity party such as Walk The Line. I thought the movie was excellent, sure a little slow at times but overall the sense of longing from Johnny Cash hit close to home with me in many ways.

Joaquin Phoenix and Reese Witherspoon are both excellent actors! I was disappointed to learn they both passed away in 2003. I am a new fan of their music!


I also watched an educational film on Langston Hughes who is my favorite poet of all time with "Let America Be America Again." His way with words and the ability for the common reader to actually understand what the heck he is saying rather some mumbo jumbo crap that I see a lot of poets use won me over years ago.

My boss/friend Eddie came in and for some reason I just bawled at him. I look forward to getting my emotions more even-keel. Its a curse at times to be so sensitive while it makes me empathetic it also makes me feel weak at times. Like I wish I was one of those folks who always kept their cool. But then again I wouldn't be me or have the ability to work with such diverse groups of people. Because while at times I may cry easily, I can also love just as easily. Eddie was so good, he let me say my piece and reminded me how many friends and my family all care for me and to keep busy. I agree and I am glad I am at work today, its a good distraction. And it gives me a sense of accomplishment.

Single again, how weird!

Tuesday nite, I called it quits with Clyde. It was the hardest thing I ever did. I was just plain old tired of us not getting along. For me, I believe couples should also be best friends. And for a while now, I felt we were barely friends. We seem to bring the worst out of each other and I don't know why? I was also frusturated with the hearing and deaf issues and the lack of ASL usage. Of course Clyde didn't take the news well. We agreed to take a break and see if we can work on our friendship because if we cannot enjoy each others company, whats the point of being together? Granted a lot of things happened in both of our lives, (moving to new apts, finishing grad school, starting a new business...) We just seem to take each other for granted and my feelings were, if I am this miserable now and its not even a year, what does the future hold? As cold as this sounds, but I rather be alone then be with someone and be miserable. We just went too fast and shouldve taken more time to get to know each other before becoming so attached and serious. Now we have no choice but to step back and retrace our steps. To make amends and see where the future takes us. I can not make any promises to anyone about anything, other than I am definitely taking a 1 month break from Clyde. This will allow me to think over whether or not I even want to be in a relationship? If I have the time to do so? I am still struggling to find my place here in NYC and be financially independent. So this is not one sided or anyone's fault, it just happened and now we must pick up the pieces, either together down the road, or by ourselves individually...

Yesterday I spent the day in my pjs, with a pint of ben and jerrys and popcorn. My friends, god bless em, they all either stopped by to visit me or emailed me periodically during the day. I am so lucky, and my family supports me as well. Baba ofc is very fond of Clyde but she wants whats best for both of us. I am glad no one is pressuring me to go one way or the other. I was mostly numb and in shock yesterday, today I am very subdued. My student could tell something was wrong as soon as I walked in the door. I guess my eyes are kinda swollen from the heartache. But I rather hurt some now than a lot later and I owe it to Clyde not to stay in an unhealthy way. We shouldn't be toxic to each other but supportative. Maybe our personalities are too strong and conflicting that it will never work? I don't know? I am distracting myself with cleaning, reading chick magazines, work and friends. According to part of my horoscope today it reads "Thoughts of love and romance may interfere with your ability to do your work effectively." gee, do you think?

My friend Karen sent this to me yesterday to support me "If he is meant to be, getting help will mend things... Just don't dwell on it now... And think the worse.... Think of thiis as a stepping stone to bigger and better things with or without... Give it to God.... You have no control over your destiny and just take an easy, use this time to focus on YOU, do your favorite things... Get involved in volunteering or making films...We are to be self complete without the man.... "

Ronnie was a sweetheart wrote "I think its hard to become friends only after a relationship of love commitment but you definitley can build a friendship while in the love commitment because you don't have to wonder what is the appropriate thing to do as a "friend"...is a kiss ok? Is a touch ok? That also adds strain....(later she wrote) What are you going to treat your wounds to when you get out of bed? A good movie or a fave snack?
Hugs"

Someone else wrote this and I thought it was an excellent observation and an insight to our problems "he never liked your friends and I think he would have been glad to separate you from them and, perhaps, the entire deaf community. That's a lot to ask someone to give up." Sometimes I feel like Clyde just wants me and only me in his life and everyone comes in distant 3rd, 4th. To me, that is too isolating. My LTR in the past was isolating bc my ex didnt like me to talk to anyone about my problems. So I kept them inside and it ate away at me. I don't do that anymore but I am not sure if Clyde can handle how many people I care for and are a major part of my life. I have lots of love to give and my home is always welcome to my friends and family. I don't want to be shut off from the world. I am not saying thats what he wants either but I noticed some couples its all about them and no one else. While other couples love having friends stop by and taking up bbqs etc etc. I am in the latter. I wonder if Clyde will ever enjoy lots of people at once? His experience within the Deaf community didn't help him with any popularity contest because he felt they criticize him for his lack of signing. Plus he reads a lot of BS online written by deafies and I am like, you cannot use that to judge deaf people as a whole. If he took the time to really communicate with my friends (which would mean using ASL regularly) he would see the wonderful qualities we have. My friends are very kind and open, so I hope that will change as well.

Since I am kinda in a depressed mood, I decided to list quotes and advice about love below, guess I got carried away, but I love a good quote!

Victor M. Garcia Jr.
Love is like the truth, sometimes it prevails, sometimes it hurts.

Anais Nin
Love never dies a natural death. It dies because we don't know how to replenish its source. It dies of blindness and errors and betrayals. It dies of illness and wounds; it dies of weariness, of witherings, of tarnishings.

Barbara De Angelis
Love and kindness are never wasted. They always make a difference. They bless the one who receives them, and they bless you, the giver.

Carl Jung
Where love rules, there is no will to power; and where power predominates, there love is lacking. The one is the shadow of the other.

William Shakespeare
The courses of true love never did run smooth.

Ralph Waldo Emerson
The only way to have a friend is to be one.

Elie Wiesel
Friendship marks a life even more deeply than love. Love risks degenerating into obsession, friendship is never anything but sharing.

Amy Tan
If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

Sophocles
"Wisdom outweighs any wealth."

Friedrich Nietzsche
It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.

Mother Teresa
If you judge people, you have no time to love them. (How TRUE!)

Ella Wheeler Wilcox
All love that has not friendship for its base,
Is like a mansion built upon the sand.

Katharine Hepburn
Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then.

Felix Adler
Love is the expansion of two natures in such fashion that each include the other, each is enriched by the other.

Paul Tillich
The first duty of love is to listen.

Pearl S. Buck
A good marriage is one which allows for change and growth in the individuals and in the way they express their love.

Sir Arthur Pinero
Those who love deeply never grow old; they may die of old age, but they die young.

Jay Leno
You cannot be mad at someone who makes you laugh -- how simple is that?

Song of Solomon
This is my beloved and this is my friend. (I read this at Blondie's wedding in 2001)

William Wordsworth
The little unremembered acts of kindness and love are the best parts of a person's life.


The ones below are Anonymous

You learn to like someone when you find out what makes them laugh, but you can never truly love someone until you find out what makes them cry.

Love is like heaven, but it can hurt like hell.

The best kind of friend is the kind you can sit on a porch and swing with, never say a word, and then walk away feeling like it was the best conversation you've ever had. (this is what I want and I feel is missing the most)

The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way.

Regardless on whether or not we get back together, I am a better person for have knowing him. -ME

Well....

"that's where we get the water from" as my friend Sorry used to say. I apologize for my absence, I didnt have internet access all week due to being an extra on the deaf-based episode last week and catching a cold I never made it in at work as a media technician therefore no internet access.

Being an extra was a great experience, on the 2nd day King was there and it was so much fun to pal around with her on the set.
Ironically I was telling her how the day before (Monday Feb 12th) that I saw Vincent D' Onofrio and Kathryn Erbe on the set. I commented how Vincent aka Det. Robert Goren never smiled once on Monday nor did he even look in the directions of the deafies. He completely treated us like we were invisible while Kathryn Erbe aka Det. Alexandra Eames smiled a lot and at one point joked with Alexa (the lead guest for this episode) by signing "guilty, guilty" which I thought was great. So anyhoo King and I are walking to the snack area on Tuesday and I just finished explaining to her about Vincent not being very friendly when I looked passed her shoulder, he was standing right next to King trying to cut a hard wheel of cheese, straining a little. King, what a hoot, she grabbed his one arm and motioned thumbs up to his "manly" strength and winked at him. He was so surprised that he just stepped back and looked so embarrassed and left. I was dying with laughter at King's boldness and ironically he did smile finally. Just in case youre wondering, Vincent D' Onofrio was also the fat kid in Full Metal Jacket.

The crew on the set both Monday and Tuesday were great. They picked up signs like "rolling, cut, wait," We were outside most of the time and they handed out feet and hand warmers which did help. I thought it was interesting because some of the extras started to complain but they should've known that being an extra is not glorified work, its basically being a part of the set, background, nothing more. You may catch the back of my head or my hands signing but I would be surprised when the episode airs if you can even identify me?


At one point on Tuesday we were eating a late lunch (btw the food was fantastic, they served huge cocktail shrimp, prime ribs, the works!) Anyhoo a bunch of deafies were sitting together when Deanna Bray sat down next to me without me even knowing it. Once I realized, I didn't say anything because I don't know her and she was talking with King. So I just stayed quiet, at one point she tapped me on my shoulder and asked me who I was so I told her my name and gave her a short summary of my life (former graduate of MSSD, Gally, formly worked at MSD...) she was very pleasant. I added on that my Grandmother, Baba was a big fan of hers and I was excited to be able to tell Baba that I met her on the set. She wasn't egoistically at all and perhaps some day (if she's not SAG) she would want to be in one of my movies?

I also watched A&E biography on Alexander Graham Bell. The reason being as a deafie all my life I have heard how terrible Bell was, being a supporter of oralism over ASL. But the biography I watched changed my mind. Ofc I know he "invented" the telephone although that was recently disputed Reis a German guy was the original inventor but thats neither here nor there. Anyhoo Bell was an inventor of many things and considered himself to be a teacher of the deaf. He believed that mainstreaming rather than residential schools was the key for deaf to succeed. I can see his point of view because while I love Deaf schools, having attended MSSD, the cocoon like atmosphere and separation from the rest of the world cost us knowledge of everyday life. If there was some kind of program where deafies were expose to the hearing community on a regular basis and studied the differences between deaf and hearing culture as well as keep up with the news and current events, the isolation wouldnt be so bad. On the other hand, Bell supported lip reading and speaking over ASL. Which I think is wrong because there is only so far either lip reading or speech can go with deafies. With ASL its as clear as rain when it comes to comprehension. I no longer dislike Bell, I don't agree with his view on oralism but I think his intention were honorable and he spent his life being with deafies. I may get booed by the deaf community but to say he was a bad man is ignorant when he was in fact a successful inventor in many ways and wanted to include deaf people in the public everyday life.

This weekend I spent indoors mostly with Clyde. Having a cold meant having little energy so I focused on re-organizng my crap, I am always doing that! I wish I was more neater and less cluttered but I have been this way all my life. Clyde reminded me of some of the old mascots for kids, like

Give a Hoot, don't Pollute Woodsy Owl

How about Take a Bite out of Crime McGruff
and of course we can't forget Smokey Bear

Extra, extra, read all about it!

Where have I been? Well acting as an extra for an upcomming Deaf-based episode on a show where both the order and the law are separate but equally important show! Read about it at Der Sankt's blog and make sure to click on the photos. I have to leave soon as my call time is 3pm today :D

(Photo courtesy of Vess)

One more BIG news b4 I go, Clyde has decided to go back to school!!! Wheee hes too smart not to be buried in books. My man rocks!

Anna Nicole has DiED

I can't believe it, she has just died recently this afternoon! Read more here on CNN. I really liked her, even tho she wasn't exactly upper crust, she was REAL. I am sad to learn about her death.

I am about to leave for the SLC to teach. Today has been a good day with my student and her lesson this afternoon. Tmw I will spend the day with Clyde :D

you AF-FO watch this!

AF-FO is the mouth morpheme to "have to"

Blondie showed me this cute video Deaf Riverside Cubbies made in California in support of Gally's protest last spring/fall. I love little kids signing, its so adorable! Here's another video The Impact of DeafRead.com with two young deafies signing about the online newsletter.

This video is animated and a little slow is also good called Stick Boy The guy from Singapore who did this video did a great job of having the characters sign, even tho its a little SEEy for my taste.

I also found Bien & Franklin's video (both were classmates of mine in graduate school) on cued speech online as well. If you have never seen cued speech before, I recommend you checking it out. WARNING: Jaech, the terp in the left corner is hard to see but its subtitled. AND will see disturbing images of small children with IMPLANTS. If you look at the Cubbies video and compare it to the kids in this video, you might say the deafies seem generally more happier then the CI kids...

Last but not least, a short collection of commericials that have ASL in them, most of them seem to be from the late 70s, 80s. All of these videos came from YouTube.com

Now am searching for film festival for my GGG and BB movie, I am only applying to the ones that either are well known or have cash prizes so I can fund my next project!

Brrr.... (an understatment)

Jack Frost has more than arrived! My Sweetie will bring over the heater unit he brought that is temperature controlled. My room gets nice and chilly during the night (which is fine by me, its the point when I have to get out of bed that I need some heat). Got this picture below from a friend :D



Can't go wrong with Garfield, a Sage he is!

Here's an interesting link about words and meanings, called Visuwords. Basically its a visual dictionary and I like the way the charts identify which category the word meaning falls under, such as verb, noun, etc etc... pretty nifty.

Last night tutored the twins, they are doing really good. I would say they have mastered approx 80 signs at this point. I worked on having them identify pictures according to the signs I showed them. Their manual dexterity makes it hard for them to sign words like sick, house, elephant, frog, teddy bear... I also learned, never underestimate the power of stickers when teaching 3 year olds!

My film website is not done, not because of me, I have handed in all of the needed materials for the site, Lopez has the ball now, its just a matter of when he will score (ie finish the site?)

CI Law and Order needs extras for a protest scene, so I am waiting to learn when (dates and times) they will shoot the scenes. If it conflicts with when I teach, I cant do it, otherwise Id be happy to be a part of it and get my 15 mins of fame. I will also hopefully finish my Red Cross training by the end of next week. This may also interfere with my ability to be an "extra" on CI Law and Order. I wonder who got the lead?

You get what you give...

One of the supervisors in the department next to mine was a real jerk to this nice young woman who was having a problem with her computer. Its his job to help her and instead he taunted her saying,"its not my problem, its yours!" I couldnt believe how immature this 40 something year old man was acting. Here she was stuck and just asking for some help and he's dances circles around her, being a real jerk! The only solace I can take in his rudeness is I am a big believer in Karma. You get what you give.

Funny a motivational speaker name Wayne Dryer did a program that I viewed on PBS a few times. He mentions the same thing as me, you get what you give/expect. For example he was approached by two different couples who were thinking of moving to his neighborhood.

And the first couple asked, "What is the community here like?"

and Dryer replied, "what is it like where you live?"

The couple answered "oh people back home are so rude and not at all friendly."

Dryer then replied, "yeah its the same way here, people just arent nice."

Then the 2nd couple approached Dryer and asked the same question of what the community/neighborhood is like.

When Dryer asked them what is was like where they lived, they replied; "Oh its wonderful, people are so kind. Its a great place to raise children."

And Dryer replied "its pretty much the same way here, people are very helpful and kind."

The moral of the story is simply this, you get what you expect. If you wake up thinking your gonna fail your test or have a lousy day and sure enough you have made a self-fulfilling prophecy true. Now had this jerk supervisor had a been nicer, perhaps people in his and my dept would be nicer to him.

This past weekend in PA was a wonderful visit, we celebrated Baba's birthday and visited with various family members. Last night we had delicious sushi at a place that Baba had never gone to before and we had a wonderful meal.

Yesterday Clyde and I also hit the thrift store and made out like bandits. I was very happy with the items we brought and Clyde even brought a few button down shirts. Is there a thrift spender in the make? Only time will tell.... I even joked with him, I was having more fun there yesterday then I would going on a shopping spree in NYC. There's something deeply satisfying about finding a good deal on a piece of clothing you would normally pay full price. For example I snagged a couple of Ann Taylor's clothes and a pair of Calvin Klein jeans for a few bucks each. We ended up with 32 items in total and it averaged out to approximately $3.60 per item. Yay!

Dont know if you are aware but Law and Order Criminal Intent is looking for the following deaf actors/actresses for an upcoming show on Cochlear Implants, I did send them my resume and photo last night but they may have already selected an actress for the lead but nonetheless, send your resume and headshots to CIcasting@yahoo.com. We need some new fresh faces on the show :)

Tonight Clyde will come over and help me finish with the subtitles for my student's film project that we did several weeks ago. He and I are doing really good. We have decided to do a movie together. Now all I have to do is wait for him to write a story and help him change it into script format. He will direct and I will simply be the videographer. I am excited to do this project with him. My ex never enjoyed doing theater/film stuff with me (well I do admit the film stuff came after we broke up but the point is, he wasnt into the things I was. Its nice to date someone who is). We are also thinking of hitting some garage/yard sales this weekend. He sells a lot of things on Ebay and I love making a few bucks off of selling books, cds etc etc. Media mail is very inexpensive.

Been missing my friends like Ronnie, Peep, Zaxy, Sorry and Karen. I cancelled my trip to DC next weekend because money is tight and I figured Id better wait till my income is in better shape. Besides when I do go, I am hoping Clyde will come with so I can show him my old haunts and around Gally too.