Saturday, January 22, 2011

Taking on the challenge

Last night was my 1st science class in years
and I left feeling so invigorated! I have always
shied away from science because historically
I've sucked at it.

I remember during my intake exam at my Deaf
high school (MSSD) that I was told as an
incoming freshmen my science skills were
of a 6th grade level. Everywhere else
academically I've always had a good
understanding or enough to get by with
a C or better. But science usually made me shudder.

Funny thing though, I've being a major astronomy
buff and physics fan all my life. But I still
view the area of Biology as the one area I
would never succeed at. And don't get me
started on Chemistry which is too much like
Trigonometry and Pre Calculus, all are
formula based and visualization of
spatial/abstracts required, that I don't
think even now I could master.

But let me tell you I am in LOVE! I was
eating up the anatomy terminology like
it was candy. Partly because I've always
paid detail attention to anatomy related
info during my college years. Plus ever
since I got my Masters in ASL and
studied linguistics and language
acquisition I not longer fear learning
other languages or a set of terminology
used in a particular field. I know what
to look for. I remember in middle
school and at MSSD, even in college
opening up the 1st page of a biology
book and instantly wanting to fall
asleep or was bored to death. I didn't
understand the words and I sure as
heck didn't have the patience to
learn them. Even if I could of
memorized terminology I don't think I
could have mastered the concepts
behind them. I think in some ways
this was due to my un-diagnosed ADD.
Already having a short attention span
and low frustration threshold didn't help.

I am grateful my professor last night
didn't start his class off with the
traditional route of cells and
membranes, ugh! Instead he dove
into anatomical terms and I really
liked it! I did still feel intimidated
but I have one thing I didn't have
before. Was it a brain? A heart?
Courage? Nope, I have Confidence!
That I will do whatever it takes to
succeed. And I am glad its a field I feel
passionate about.

So I didn't sleep much last night, too
excited. I even did the homework and
I am still not finish. This isn't one of
those 1 page worksheets done in 10
minutes. But a few hours and did I
mind? Hell no!?! And earlier this
evening when I came home and getting
dinner started I started sprouting
anatomical terminology to Jack while
pointing to my body to demonstrate
where the references were to?

And for the past few days, I've
also been very spoiled, having
access to a car to commute to work
and school. Its made me all the
more excited to move in March.
Its time I upgraded my surroundings.
I realize that while I pride myself as a
person who makes lemonade out of lemons.
Sometimes I forget to say, "this
is not enough. I deserve
more." For a long time and even
now I have seen myself as poor.
There has never been a major time
in my life where money was truly
a luxury. Don't get me wrong my
Grandparents did/do spoil me in
their own way. But I am not demanding
or ask for things I don't consider a
necessity. I would never want to take
away from someone else's quality of
life. I don't believe in bleeding someone
dry, just because you can. Anyways
I am learning to change my thinking
to the possibility I don't have to
struggle financially for the rest of
my life as I have. And for the next
few years, I am still gonna be really
poor as a student but that's fine. I've got
plenty of practice at it :]

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